***Arc 7 One Who Bare Their Fang on Reason, Chapter 160 A Coward***
It's not that she was particularly fond of cooking.
It's all the same as long as it goes in the mouth and fills the stomach.
Nutritious or not, easy to eat or not.
That was about it, and it wasn't something she was interested in from the start.
To pay Argan's debt, Christand gave up most of his personal fortune.
At the time, Christand could not afford to hire servants, and since she was going to be taken care of, she wanted to at least get those chores done.
It all started with a simple sense of duty.
The old estate, which had just been bought, was spacious enough for the three of them to spend time together, but Bogan had sold off most of the furnishings, except for his books.
There's just the bare essentials――vases and paintings with no-value.
It wasn't that difficult to manage such a cold estate, and one person was enough.
For Bogan, who gave up a lot for her sister, she tried to at least make a living as before, and that daily life went quite well.
Her older sister helped Bogan, who had just been promoted to corps commander, with paperwork and other duties.
Bery took care of things inside the estate.
Seeing her happy sister was the most important thing, and there was no question about such a life.
Doing laundry, cleaning.
While tending a small orchard and vegetable garden, she picks affordable items for dinner.
Usually around that time, her sister would appear in the kitchen.
"...Bery, are you making dinner already? Take a break, geez. I need you to leave a little something for me to do."
"I mean if I leave it to Nee-sama, it will be a lot of trouble, especially the cooking…"
"You…"
Her silky red hair swayed, her hands on her hips disapprovingly.
Her face was somehow full of charm, and Bery smiled sweetly.
Lazura Argan was always beautiful, and was always a woman who Bery adored.
"... I'm scared because you'll get a fever right away when you say that."
"Unlike in the past, my health is better these days. Since Gotoushu-sama taught me body enhancement, I've been less tired, Nee-sama is worrying too much."
"In your case, worrying too much is just right."
She hugged her from behind and put her chin on her head.
Her silky hair tickled her neck and her shoulders, and she loved that sensation.
"You're still a child, so let Nee-sama pamper you."
"……It’s already enough, I’m too spoiled."
"You’re not spoiled enough. Razula Onee-sama is not satisfied, you know. You can be stickier and clingier you know. ...What are you making today?"
"It's a tomato-based soup. Since Nee-sama liked it."
The older sister, somewhat happily, picked up the ladle and sipped the soup.
"Delicious. Fufu, no matter what you do, you're the best little sister in the world, but when it comes to cooking, you're a great genius."
"Nee-sama always praises me excessively. No matter what I make, Nee-sama always says it’s delicious."
"Bery works very hard to make it match my taste. How can it not be delicious?"
She looked at her as she cupped her cheeks.
She looked away in embarrassment and her sister amusedly.
"Because I look forward to the food you make every day. …Making that face again, has Onee-sama ever lied to you before?"
"…There are a lot just by remembering a little."
"Forget that. It's just your imagination——the only thing that matters is now, Bery."
"Always going with the flow like that."
"Don't say that. What a foul-mouthed child!"
The trigger for it was probably something as trivial as that.
It might be a compliment to her servile sister, or maybe not.
Just, she was happy to see her smile like that when she cooked for her——she made an effort to make her happy like that.
Probably, she came to love cooking because it gave her confidence that she could make someone happy.
She was unable to do anything, and cooking just happened to be the thing that she picked up.
In truth, anything was fine.
At least at that time, her life was to achieve revenge.
In the meantime, she thought it would be nice if she could return the favor to the two of them, and that was one of the ways to do so.
In the meantime, I thought it would be nice if I could return the favor to the two of them, and that was one of the ways to do so.
"…Huh?"
"Did you think that the nice and fine Onee-sama that you respect can't see through the fact that you're thinking about stupid things? I will tell you, that’s just self-satisfaction, Bery. If you think that it's for me, you're mistaken. I wouldn't be happy even if you stabbed Roland to death."
"Hg…but, I’m——"
"No but."
Her older sister put her hands on her hips and pointed angrily at her.
"I'm not happy about it either, I wanted to tear Roland to pieces. But it's over and done with, it’s in the past. I'm happy now that I met Bogan, Selene was born, and that I get to eat my little sister's delicious food every day. I want to thank Roland for that."
"Such a thing——"
"It was just that kind of fortuitous meeting, Bery. At least right now I'm the happiest person in the world. If you are doing it for me, or for my sake, or for such a silly reason, please stop it."
Her older sister stared at her and she looked away.
Her sister always had a triumphant and kind smile on her face at such times.
"If you, as a noble, cannot forgive the humiliation you have suffered, then I won’t stop you. But if you, as my family, say it is for my sake, I assure you it is not. I don't need to tell you why, right?"
"…But."
"Look, don't cry. Don't talk back. I'm so glad you feel that way ...As your older sister, I'm proud that my little sister loves me that much."
Whenever she cried, her older sister would wipe it off.
She hated herself for being so spoiled.
"But if you feel that way about me, I'd be happy if you worked hard to keep me happy. You are my proud sister, and your happiness is my happiness, just as you think of me that way. Do you dislike your life now? Is it unhappy for you?"
"No, that kind of thing, is"
"Right? Fufu, your Onee-sama knows everything about you."
She kissed her forehead and told her not to cry.
Tears spilled helplessly, and her older sister laughed as if she was troubled.
"I know all about your mean-spiritedness. I know all too well how you think you're worthless and that there's only so much you can do."
Her sister glared as she fell silent.
"I may have what you lack, but you also have what I lack. But you also have what I lack――you are my other half. You do the housework for me, you cook for me.... I would be in trouble without you. Is that what you want, to annoy your beloved half, your Onee-sama?"
She shook her head and her older sister hugged her and stroked her head.
Her tears flowed more and more, how miserable (pathetic).
"It's a fortuitous meeting. Just like me, I want you to be grateful for such a fortune and to find your own happiness from now on."
"You’re the best little sister in the world after all", her older sister said with a mischievous laugh.
"I need you to be the happiest person in the world," such idiotic words followed.
Her sister always repeated those words to the point of being excessive.
"That makes me happy, and so does Bogan. If you're good with knives, don't think about stupid things and cook delicious food, understand? Are you sure you're going to feed my sweet Selene some of my homemade food? I’ll get angry if you say that okay."
"…Nee-sama, handmade food…certainly I can’t let her eat that."
"Yes absolutely. I will be troubled if you won’t cook for me."
Her sister proudly said something shameful.
She loved that sister of hers and.
"I love you, Bery. …So, can you promise me? Until another happiness comes to you someday, you'll always stay by my side and do that."
"...Yes, Nee-sama."
"Fufun, I’ll take your word for it. I won't let you go back on it okay."
"Yes. …I swear by this name."
That’s why, it was a means to an end, but before she knew it, it had turned into something irreplaceable.
"……Pretty"
The rain has stopped and the moonlight shines through the clouds.
She looked at Krische and Kreschenta sleeping next to her and stroked their heads.
Silver hair and gold glittering red hair.
Their hair was beautifully mixed together, and their sleeping profiles looked exactly alike.
She gently stroked their hair and smiled.
Then she slowly got up, gently put on her shoes and went out into the hallway.
She walked down the stairs to the kitchen and looked around for a while.
She looked at the cooking utensils lined up in the spacious kitchen and squinted.
There was a memory in each of the tools that she collected over the years.
She smiled wryly remembering that she spent a lot of money to challenge various dishes.
It was half a hobby, half a waste of money.
"Bery, this, how do you use this?"
But she had no regrets about it, and she was okay with that.
Because she could always remember her happy face.
She looked at the condiments, took out each one, and tasted a little bit.
From mere flavoring to secret seasonings――the number of ingredients she has collected was probably as large as those in the palace’s kitchen, as well as the variety of cooking utensils.
But all of them were like sand to the current Bery.
Texture and aroma, that's about all she could tell.
She took each of them out of her memory drawer and understood it as she looked at them.
Two weeks after waking up, she cooked the same food as before, with nothing but anxiety in her chest.
She only made dishes that she was confident in and familiar with.
And one she won’t make a mistake with the seasoning.
But she wasn't sure how long that would last.
Day by day, the slightest deviation piled up, and in a few months, it will undoubtedly become a deviation next year.
When that happens, Krische will no doubt notice it.
She didn't dare try a new seasoning, and as she looked at Krische, who was happy, what’s in her head was terror.
Maybe tomorrow she will be cured.
If not tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.
Even as she thought like that, she didn’t even have the courage to speak out.
"…As I thought, I can’t become like you, Nee-sama."
She thought she had grown a little more than before.
A trivial thing saved her life, so it’s fine.
She shouldn’t ask for more than that.
Because of her own fault, Krische even challenged the dragon.
Krische, who never gets hurt, even on the battlefield, was covered in scars all over.
Even though she did not know how powerful the dragon was, she could understand just what that signified.
It was thanks to that that she was still alive, and she didn't want to make Krische, who had gone to such lengths to save her, sad.
――No, wrong.
It was probably not that, but that in the end she was just afraid.
She was afraid that the connection between her and Krische, Cooking, would disappear from inside her.
She was just afraid of what Krische'll think of her who was without sense of taste.
Surprising her, making her happy.
She wondered where the value of such her would be if she could no longer do those things.
In the end, what she feared was her own interest.
She was terribly afraid of letting go of the one thing that connected her the most with Krische.
She knew Krische’s kindness and her affection.
She knew that she would never do such a thing, but she was afraid that she would be disappointed with her.
That's why she couldn't tell her and kept putting it off.
She was hopelessly pathetic and weak.
"...Bery?"
Hearing the voice, her shoulders jumped and she turned around.
Krische in a negligee looked a little sleepy and was looking at her from the entrance curiously.
"Krische-sama, what happened?"
"... No, umm, when Krische woke up because of Kreschenta’s sleeping position, Bery wasn't there. What is Bery doing?"
Relieved that she had put the condiments away, she smiled.
"I got a little thirsty. So, I thought of making some hot milk."
Krische stepped closer to her and leaned in close.
Her body was warm, probably because she was just asleep.
Even in the dark, her purple eyes shone in the moonlight shining through the window.
Her sparkling, jewel-like eyes turned toward her, and she asked.
"Bery, um, are you okay?"
"Huh?"
"Well… the magical power inside Bery’s body has also changed, and Krische thought that Bery might actually feel pain or discomfort somewhere. …Krische heard that the blood Bery got from Regalave-san is very stimulating, so Krische is worried after all."
Krische said and lowered her eyes.
"Like I said before, the body is in better condition than before. It’s true that I feel a little uncomfortable when manipulating the body… but maybe because I have gotten used to it, it’s easier than before."
As she said that, she felt pathetic and wanted to sigh.
Even after all this she was still afraid to say it.
At that time, it might have even been better if she had confided in Selene.
Day by day, her heart seems to grow frightened, and as the days pass, she loses her courage.
"I’m okay."
She stroked her head and she nodded quietly.
She felt guilty for lying to Krische, but she couldn’t bring herself to tell her.
‘The worst’ she thought to herself.
"Well, if Bery feels something strange, tell Krische immediately. Krische will do something about it."
"Yes. …Would you like to have a drink too, Krische-sama?"
"Ehehe, yes"
Krische nodded and smiled.
Bery smiled too and went to get some cold milk from the fridge.
As Krische turned to pick up the honey, she looked to the condiments right next to it.
She froze, and Bery, with her back to her, didn't notice it.
***Arc 7 One Who Bare Their Fang on Reason, Chapter 160 A Coward***
It's not that she was particularly fond of cooking.
It's all the same as long as it goes in the mouth and fills the stomach.
Nutritious or not, easy to eat or not.
That was about it, and it wasn't something she was interested in from the start.
To pay Argan's debt, Christand gave up most of his personal fortune.
At the time, Christand could not afford to hire servants, and since she was going to be taken care of, she wanted to at least get those chores done.
It all started with a simple sense of duty.
The old estate, which had just been bought, was spacious enough for the three of them to spend time together, but Bogan had sold off most of the furnishings, except for his books.
There's just the bare essentials――vases and paintings with no-value.
It wasn't that difficult to manage such a cold estate, and one person was enough.
For Bogan, who gave up a lot for her sister, she tried to at least make a living as before, and that daily life went quite well.
Her older sister helped Bogan, who had just been promoted to corps commander, with paperwork and other duties.
Bery took care of things inside the estate.
Seeing her happy sister was the most important thing, and there was no question about such a life.
Doing laundry, cleaning.
While tending a small orchard and vegetable garden, she picks affordable items for dinner.
Usually around that time, her sister would appear in the kitchen.
"...Bery, are you making dinner already? Take a break, geez. I need you to leave a little something for me to do."
"I mean if I leave it to Nee-sama, it will be a lot of trouble, especially the cooking…"
"You…"
Her silky red hair swayed, her hands on her hips disapprovingly.
Her face was somehow full of charm, and Bery smiled sweetly.
Lazura Argan was always beautiful, and was always a woman who Bery adored.
"... I'm scared because you'll get a fever right away when you say that."
"Unlike in the past, my health is better these days. Since Gotoushu-sama taught me body enhancement, I've been less tired, Nee-sama is worrying too much."
"In your case, worrying too much is just right."
She hugged her from behind and put her chin on her head.
Her silky hair tickled her neck and her shoulders, and she loved that sensation.
"You're still a child, so let Nee-sama pamper you."
"……It’s already enough, I’m too spoiled."
"You’re not spoiled enough. Razula Onee-sama is not satisfied, you know. You can be stickier and clingier you know. ...What are you making today?"
"It's a tomato-based soup. Since Nee-sama liked it."
The older sister, somewhat happily, picked up the ladle and sipped the soup.
"Delicious. Fufu, no matter what you do, you're the best little sister in the world, but when it comes to cooking, you're a great genius."
"Nee-sama always praises me excessively. No matter what I make, Nee-sama always says it’s delicious."
"Bery works very hard to make it match my taste. How can it not be delicious?"
She looked at her as she cupped her cheeks.
She looked away in embarrassment and her sister amusedly.
"Because I look forward to the food you make every day. …Making that face again, has Onee-sama ever lied to you before?"
"…There are a lot just by remembering a little."
"Forget that. It's just your imagination——the only thing that matters is now, Bery."
"Always going with the flow like that."
"Don't say that. What a foul-mouthed child!"
The trigger for it was probably something as trivial as that.
It might be a compliment to her servile sister, or maybe not.
Just, she was happy to see her smile like that when she cooked for her——she made an effort to make her happy like that.
Probably, she came to love cooking because it gave her confidence that she could make someone happy.
She was unable to do anything, and cooking just happened to be the thing that she picked up.
In truth, anything was fine.
At least at that time, her life was to achieve revenge.
In the meantime, she thought it would be nice if she could return the favor to the two of them, and that was one of the ways to do so.
In the meantime, I thought it would be nice if I could return the favor to the two of them, and that was one of the ways to do so.
"…Huh?"
"Did you think that the nice and fine Onee-sama that you respect can't see through the fact that you're thinking about stupid things? I will tell you, that’s just self-satisfaction, Bery. If you think that it's for me, you're mistaken. I wouldn't be happy even if you stabbed Roland to death."
"Hg…but, I’m——"
"No but."
Her older sister put her hands on her hips and pointed angrily at her.
"I'm not happy about it either, I wanted to tear Roland to pieces. But it's over and done with, it’s in the past. I'm happy now that I met Bogan, Selene was born, and that I get to eat my little sister's delicious food every day. I want to thank Roland for that."
"Such a thing——"
"It was just that kind of fortuitous meeting, Bery. At least right now I'm the happiest person in the world. If you are doing it for me, or for my sake, or for such a silly reason, please stop it."
Her older sister stared at her and she looked away.
Her sister always had a triumphant and kind smile on her face at such times.
"If you, as a noble, cannot forgive the humiliation you have suffered, then I won’t stop you. But if you, as my family, say it is for my sake, I assure you it is not. I don't need to tell you why, right?"
"…But."
"Look, don't cry. Don't talk back. I'm so glad you feel that way ...As your older sister, I'm proud that my little sister loves me that much."
Whenever she cried, her older sister would wipe it off.
She hated herself for being so spoiled.
"But if you feel that way about me, I'd be happy if you worked hard to keep me happy. You are my proud sister, and your happiness is my happiness, just as you think of me that way. Do you dislike your life now? Is it unhappy for you?"
"No, that kind of thing, is"
"Right? Fufu, your Onee-sama knows everything about you."
She kissed her forehead and told her not to cry.
Tears spilled helplessly, and her older sister laughed as if she was troubled.
"I know all about your mean-spiritedness. I know all too well how you think you're worthless and that there's only so much you can do."
Her sister glared as she fell silent.
"I may have what you lack, but you also have what I lack. But you also have what I lack――you are my other half. You do the housework for me, you cook for me.... I would be in trouble without you. Is that what you want, to annoy your beloved half, your Onee-sama?"
She shook her head and her older sister hugged her and stroked her head.
Her tears flowed more and more, how miserable (pathetic).
"It's a fortuitous meeting. Just like me, I want you to be grateful for such a fortune and to find your own happiness from now on."
"You’re the best little sister in the world after all", her older sister said with a mischievous laugh.
"I need you to be the happiest person in the world," such idiotic words followed.
Her sister always repeated those words to the point of being excessive.
"That makes me happy, and so does Bogan. If you're good with knives, don't think about stupid things and cook delicious food, understand? Are you sure you're going to feed my sweet Selene some of my homemade food? I’ll get angry if you say that okay."
"…Nee-sama, handmade food…certainly I can’t let her eat that."
"Yes absolutely. I will be troubled if you won’t cook for me."
Her sister proudly said something shameful.
She loved that sister of hers and.
"I love you, Bery. …So, can you promise me? Until another happiness comes to you someday, you'll always stay by my side and do that."
"...Yes, Nee-sama."
"Fufun, I’ll take your word for it. I won't let you go back on it okay."
"Yes. …I swear by this name."
That’s why, it was a means to an end, but before she knew it, it had turned into something irreplaceable.
"……Pretty"
The rain has stopped and the moonlight shines through the clouds.
She looked at Krische and Kreschenta sleeping next to her and stroked their heads.
Silver hair and gold glittering red hair.
Their hair was beautifully mixed together, and their sleeping profiles looked exactly alike.
She gently stroked their hair and smiled.
Then she slowly got up, gently put on her shoes and went out into the hallway.
She walked down the stairs to the kitchen and looked around for a while.
She looked at the cooking utensils lined up in the spacious kitchen and squinted.
There was a memory in each of the tools that she collected over the years.
She smiled wryly remembering that she spent a lot of money to challenge various dishes.
It was half a hobby, half a waste of money.
"Bery, this, how do you use this?"
But she had no regrets about it, and she was okay with that.
Because she could always remember her happy face.
She looked at the condiments, took out each one, and tasted a little bit.
From mere flavoring to secret seasonings――the number of ingredients she has collected was probably as large as those in the palace’s kitchen, as well as the variety of cooking utensils.
But all of them were like sand to the current Bery.
Texture and aroma, that's about all she could tell.
She took each of them out of her memory drawer and understood it as she looked at them.
Two weeks after waking up, she cooked the same food as before, with nothing but anxiety in her chest.
She only made dishes that she was confident in and familiar with.
And one she won’t make a mistake with the seasoning.
But she wasn't sure how long that would last.
Day by day, the slightest deviation piled up, and in a few months, it will undoubtedly become a deviation next year.
When that happens, Krische will no doubt notice it.
She didn't dare try a new seasoning, and as she looked at Krische, who was happy, what’s in her head was terror.
Maybe tomorrow she will be cured.
If not tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.
Even as she thought like that, she didn’t even have the courage to speak out.
"…As I thought, I can’t become like you, Nee-sama."
She thought she had grown a little more than before.
A trivial thing saved her life, so it’s fine.
She shouldn’t ask for more than that.
Because of her own fault, Krische even challenged the dragon.
Krische, who never gets hurt, even on the battlefield, was covered in scars all over.
Even though she did not know how powerful the dragon was, she could understand just what that signified.
It was thanks to that that she was still alive, and she didn't want to make Krische, who had gone to such lengths to save her, sad.
――No, wrong.
It was probably not that, but that in the end she was just afraid.
She was afraid that the connection between her and Krische, Cooking, would disappear from inside her.
She was just afraid of what Krische'll think of her who was without sense of taste.
Surprising her, making her happy.
She wondered where the value of such her would be if she could no longer do those things.
In the end, what she feared was her own interest.
She was terribly afraid of letting go of the one thing that connected her the most with Krische.
She knew Krische’s kindness and her affection.
She knew that she would never do such a thing, but she was afraid that she would be disappointed with her.
That's why she couldn't tell her and kept putting it off.
She was hopelessly pathetic and weak.
"...Bery?"
Hearing the voice, her shoulders jumped and she turned around.
Krische in a negligee looked a little sleepy and was looking at her from the entrance curiously.
"Krische-sama, what happened?"
"... No, umm, when Krische woke up because of Kreschenta’s sleeping position, Bery wasn't there. What is Bery doing?"
Relieved that she had put the condiments away, she smiled.
"I got a little thirsty. So, I thought of making some hot milk."
Krische stepped closer to her and leaned in close.
Her body was warm, probably because she was just asleep.
Even in the dark, her purple eyes shone in the moonlight shining through the window.
Her sparkling, jewel-like eyes turned toward her, and she asked.
"Bery, um, are you okay?"
"Huh?"
"Well… the magical power inside Bery’s body has also changed, and Krische thought that Bery might actually feel pain or discomfort somewhere. …Krische heard that the blood Bery got from Regalave-san is very stimulating, so Krische is worried after all."
Krische said and lowered her eyes.
"Like I said before, the body is in better condition than before. It’s true that I feel a little uncomfortable when manipulating the body… but maybe because I have gotten used to it, it’s easier than before."
As she said that, she felt pathetic and wanted to sigh.
Even after all this she was still afraid to say it.
At that time, it might have even been better if she had confided in Selene.
Day by day, her heart seems to grow frightened, and as the days pass, she loses her courage.
"I’m okay."
She stroked her head and she nodded quietly.
She felt guilty for lying to Krische, but she couldn’t bring herself to tell her.
‘The worst’ she thought to herself.
"Well, if Bery feels something strange, tell Krische immediately. Krische will do something about it."
"Yes. …Would you like to have a drink too, Krische-sama?"
"Ehehe, yes"
Krische nodded and smiled.
Bery smiled too and went to get some cold milk from the fridge.
As Krische turned to pick up the honey, she looked to the condiments right next to it.
She froze, and Bery, with her back to her, didn't notice it.
