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Published at 10th of August 2016 02:36:56 PM


Chapter 74

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Chapter 74 – The Lord’s Daughter Longs for the Wide World 37

 

The Lord of Coura, Grisha was deeply anxious and suspicious, he couldn’t trust a single soul.

His personality lacked stability.

With just a few words from people and little things happening, his values would greatly change.
What’s important to him would be trash the next day, and yesterday’s trash becomes tomorrow’s treasure.

Grisha probably didn’t have what it takes to be Lord.
He clearly lacked the majesty to rule over a single town as a Count.

He would always abuse his power on people around him.

“Master had another idea again and said something”

Behind his back, Grisha was ridiculed and alienated.

But when his late wife was alive, he did his job as a Lord properly.
Her always cheerfully smiling face brought peace to his deeply anxious heart, putting him at ease.

When he knew his wife was there, he was able to stand firm.
Doing government work by the day, and spending the nights with his wife and Kirisha telling jokes.

Because he had his wife, Grisha could in turn become a pillar for his wife, daughter, and town.

— But his wife had succumbed to illness and passed away.

The pillar that gave him strength was gone.
And Grisha no longer had the strength of heart.

After his wife died, he almost never talked to his daughter Kirisha.
Not that he didn’t love her, but he didn’t have the strength of heart to support her.

Grisha’s type could not care for other people unless their hearts and lives were fulfilled.

Frequent fits of anxiety.
Deep isolation.
Grisha, looking for some support, married again.

His second wife was even more of a support that his first.
Grisha entrusted everything his wife, who had the eye to see through everything.
He completely leaned against the pillar that was his second wife.

— And was dominated by her.

Grisha knew well inside his heart that he was being manipulated by his wife.
But he could no longer let go of his wife now, and refused to look at himself.

Grisha’s heart was focused on his wife and their two daughters.

He began to care less and less about his first wife’s daughter Kirisha.

— Even though she was his irreplaceable treasure just a while before.

**

To Kirisha, born to such an unstable man, the mansion had turned into an unreliable place.
Her own footing would shake based on her father’s whims.

She wanted somewhere firm.
She wanted stability.

Then, she heard about Yuutarou.

Invincible, victor of many battles.
Always smiling no matter what trouble he comes across. A great hero, gaining victories by having free reign of the Goddess’ magic
A hero that will definitely not lose.

He was what she had been looking for.
Therefore she went out and came to him.

Yuutarou was like the rumors say, a bright and gentle young man.
He did not show his anxiety to people, not even the night before a campaign.
Always smiling and patting her head no matter the situation.

He was stable.
She could be at peace next to him.

She thought.
I wanted to go on a journey with him and seek out my Utopia —

But at that time, talks were brought up about Kirisha’s engagement with the third son of the Gingaits.
Kirisha didn’t have the right to object so she gave up.
She thought she had no choice but to be this Montavo person’s wife —

But Yuutarou came along at that time and stopped the engagement.
He was kind.
He’s definitely the person who would give her peace.
Yuutarou, who would always come to help any time —

But Yuutarou made an unexpected proposal.

[Fight with me with Kirisha at stake! If I won, Kirisha will go on a journey with me]

Why did he say something like that? Kirisha doubted.
There’s no need to do that, there’s no reason to fight.
The only reason would be if he wanted a duel.

If it became a duel, then Kirisha’s surroundings will become turbulent.
She will be put on a show.

Kirisha was sad.
Why does even Yuutarou contnue to do things that would take away her peace.
Why wouldn’t they listen to other peoples circumstances and positions.
If Yuutarou’s a person with power, then he should have other ways to do it.

Kirisha tried to protest to Yuutarou in a roundabout way but he didn’t notice her feelings at all.
He never had a doubt that Kirisha was thankful to him.

Right then, she realized.

— Could it be, Yuutarou was not stable, but merely finished?

Could it be, only Yuutarou exists in Yuutarou’s world, and that he only thought about making himself look good —

Until the day the duel opens, Kirisha spent her days suspecting Yuutarou.
Maybe, she wouldn’t be able to get her peace if she went with Yuutarou —

Kirisha buried her face in the back of her tamed beasts, deep in thought.

That time, Kirisha met with the “Uncle”
A calm, consistently polite person.
He was about the same age as her father.
He seemed to be lonely and came to the forest everyday to deliberately meet with Kirisha.

Kirisha had a favorable impression of the Uncle.
She probably saw the image of the ideal father in him.

Uncle always listens to what Kirisha says, and made precise retorts.

And even though Uncle didn’t look all that strong, he used his body to shield her from the rampaging black wolf.
The trustworthy person she had always been looking for —

After that, Uncle’s home became Kirisha’s playhouse.

Kirisha played with Liu and Ruby at Uncle’s house, and planted flowers in his backyard.
An unchanging, peaceful daily life — she was in a state of bliss.
It would be great if days like this could just go on.

But life continued to change.

One day, before Yuutarou and Montavo’s fight took place.
Kirisha’s father had a quarrel with his wife Irene and chased her out of the house.

Kirisha didn’t know the details, but it seemed her father believed Irene had committed adultery.

Kirisha father’s condition became bad afterwards, and he confined himself in his room.
Being weakened, he called Kirisha and they talked like they did in the old days.
Remembering the time when her mother was alive, Kirisha felt joy.

— But even this will change anyway.

Kirisha took the long view.
She no longer believed in anything everlasting.

 

And just as she thought, her father changed again.

 

After Yuutarou and Montavo’s fight concluded, rumors circulated in town that the fight was a scam.
As one of the ringleaders, the Lord was blamed by the people.
Faced with that kind of dilemma, there’s no way he could have stayed calm.

Kirisha’s father became tense, his unease was contagious.
He no longer seemed to care about Kirisha again.

Kirisha didn’t want to stay in that house, but she no longer felt like going on a journey with Yuutarou, either.

Just as she thought, Yuutarou only wanted to stand out.

During the duel, he lost his cool only from a slight wound by Montavo, and finally he killed him without mercy.

Montavo’s tragic corpse — that might be the end Yuutarou was walking towards.

She can’t follow.

Kirisha realized.
Just what did she love about that flimsy boy?
She thought she wanted to remember, but the memory was no longer there.
When she fell in love with Yuutarou, she might just have lost her mind then — she could only think that some strange power was at play.

 

There was no place without change.
Nowhere.

Kirisha gave up.

However, the “Uncle” taught Kirisha.

The absolute way to make a place that doesn’t change.

**

The Lord’s estate was busy that day.

Influential people came over every day asking for an explanation about Yuutarou and Montavo’s fight.

Kirisha was looking for something all over that residence.
They’re supposed to be hiding somewhere —

Then, she found those two in a tool shed.

“Yuyu, Lala! There you are! Big sis has been looking for you desuyo!”

Kirisha was looking for Yuyu and Lala.
Her twin sisters born from her father’s second wife Irene.

Irene was chased out of the mansion after the adultery case, but she couldn’t take her two daughters with her.

The twins left behind spent their days like Kirisha did before, with no one to care for them.
They were free from want, but there was nobody there to cherish them.

Kirisha and the twins’ positions were reversed.

For Kirisha, this was the chance to pay back the grudge she had piled up.

However —

“Come along, let’s have some snacks with big sis! We’re baking some scones desuyo!”

With a gentle smile and voice, Kirisha invited the twins for tea.

The twins were cautious but they took Kirisha’s hand.

The three of them headed towards the dining table.

There were snacks prepared on the table.
But only for one person.

Kirisha glared at the maid by the table.

“— where’s Yuyu and Lala’s portion? Kirisha thought Kirisha ordered for three snacks!?”

“But … milady …”

The maid awkwardly averted her eyes.

The Lord had been keeping Yuyu and Lala at an abnormal distance lately.
He suspected that they might not have been his children.

Therefore, the house help also completely changed their attitudes toward them.
They might displease the Lord if they treated the twins with care.

Kirisha did not want to allow that sort of thing.

“Prepare snacks for these two right away”

“B, but …”

“Just do it!! Kirisha will talk to Papa!!”

Kirisha called her twin sisters and hugged them close.

“— Kirisha won’t forgive you if you bully these girls”

Full of will in her eyes, Kirisha glared at the maids.
Sharp.
Declaring her intent to protect the girls even if it meant her life —

“U, understood … I will prepare them right away”

The maid lost the contest of will and hurried for the kitchen.

Kirisha let out a huff, and smiled again at the twins in her arms.

“Don’t mind Papa or anyone else. No matter what anyone else says you’re definitely Papa’s girls, you’re Kirisha’s sisters desuyo !”

She ran her fingers through the twins’ hair.

“Kirisha — I mean, I will protect the both of you”

As she smiled, Kirisha recalled what the Uncle said the other day.

**

No matter how hard you look, you won’t find anyone who would give you a steady place.
People are naturally unsteady things.
Even if you found somebody that will give you peace, that person might someday change.
But there is just one way that you can have an unchanging place for yourself.

— You yourself should become an absolutely unchanging place for others.

Decide who you want to protect, and vow to be the pillar of support for them.
It’s not an easy thing.
Because people change easily, it’s really hard to not change and continue to protect others. They won’t be so thankful of you, either.
But, at the end of it lies true unchangingness — you won’t find stability anywhere other than at the end of that road.
You don’t look for it, you make it yourself.

**

Kirisha listened to his words and thought.
She should aim to make herself a stable place for her twin little sisters.
Those who were weaker than herself.
The girls who were driven to isolation like Kirisha once was.

If she abandoned the girls, she could never face her mother in heaven.

Thes one of the twins timidly opened her mouth.

“Onee, chan…”

“Yes, onee-chan desuyo! I’ll be your big sister forever and ever and ever!”

Not to look for a pillar but become the pillar of support herself —

The childhood days of looking for people to rely on were over.

This was Kirisha’s growth to adulthood.

“— I will be the pillar for the two of you”





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