I woke up to the sensation of my skull trying to split itself into two. I thought the country splitting up over the civil war was bad, but that couldn’t compare to how my head felt. Every throb of the headache brought with it pain to force my eyes shut.
It was no simple hangover after whatever Thad gave me to drink, either. I was trained to be immune to hangovers.
The cause of the pain was obvious considering what I was worried about before going to sleep.
I didn’t have my meds. I took those multiple times a day like clockwork. Once in the morning, once at noon, and then again before bed. The last time I took them was the previous day’s morning before the tournament. That meant I probably went about twenty-four hours without them already, and that was apparently enough for some withdrawal symptoms to kick in.
Getting up, I sat on the side of my bed and rubbed my head to try and get rid of the pain if only by a little. “What? You can’t handle going a single day without some drugs?” I asked myself. “I feel like some kind of addict like this. Well, at least this headache might distract me from worrying.”
“W-worry about what? Is something wrong?” a familiar voice asked, almost making me jump.
But I was trained to never jump in surprise. It is a sign of weakness akin to rolling onto your back and showing your belly to the wolf wanting to tear it apart.
Thad only managed to make me jump the previous night because I was so lost in my doubts and worries that I failed to live up to my own standards. That aside, when I looked up to see who it was who asked me that question, I saw Enna standing there ready for another day of work. “When’d you get in here?” I asked her.
“Do—do you not recall me waking you up?” Enna asked me.
I shook my head. “Can’t say I do.”
“I attempted to wake you up an hour ago, but you groaned and told me to go away. Then I came back thirty minutes ago, and you mumbled something about manifest destiny. Ten minutes ago, you told me five more minutes. Five minutes ago, you told me another five more minutes. Do… do you need five more?”
“Manifest destiny, huh?” I yawned and stood up despite that headache doing everything in its power to stop me. “I have no idea what I must have been thinking or dreaming when I said that. Personally, I’m not a fan of taking away other’s freedoms in a mad grab for land.”
“Are… those things somehow connected?”
“Right. I still need to give you some history lessons. Anyways, to answer your first question, I’m fine.”
“Are you sure? I want to take your word for it, but…”
“I’m fine in the ways that matter and that’s all that’s important. How’s everybody doing today? Any news?”
Enna looked hesitant to move on but nodded and did so. “Both of our units have finished moving to their destinations and have three more movement points available to them, so it is possible to discover two of our neighboring regions today! Unless we discover one that wraps around in such a way to be on both our south and northwest border.”
“Is that all?”
“For now, yes!”
A gust of wind shook the tent and lifted up the entrance flap enough for the sun to come through, making me squint my eyes as that sharp pain in my head dug even digger into my brain. Going outside was going to be miserable, but I had to do it. I wasn’t about to sit around inside all day, especially while others were busy working.
Moving the units could be done before leaving the tent, though, just to buy me a bit more time in the shade.
I ordered both of the military units to continue moving toward the unexplored borders and then looked at Enna again. There was one more topic on my mind before I could devote my attention to the game. “Do you have any idea what happened to Sara?”
“A-ah… well, she… was already dealt with once this morning,” Enna answered.
“What do you mean by that?”
“She came to the camp and demanded that we fetch food and water for her. I… I was going to, but Thad told me that you wouldn’t let her order me around, so I shouldn’t let her, either. Hearing that was enough to make her leave again.”
“Sounds like she really can’t handle others not rolling over for her.’
“Well, she is a daughter of Luc—”
“—y.”
“Ri-right. You still insist on calling him that?”
“Of course. It’s his name.”
“Well, that aside… considering that she is his daughter, she has been taken care of her entire life by countless servants. Disobeying any request from her was enough to warrant permanent death.”
“As opposed to temporary death?”
Enna nodded. “Death of the physical body is only temporary. The soul survives. Should the soul itself be destroyed, though, then that is permanent death with no return from.”
“And she’s gotten people’s souls destroyed for disobeying her orders?”
Enna shook her head that time. “Nobody has ever been foolish enough to disobey her, but it has happened with her other siblings. Well… nobody has ever been foolish enough to disobey her until you. It is entirely possible that all of our actions here may result in our souls’ executions upon return to Hell.”
“I won’t let that happen.”
She still looked worried about it, so I placed a hand on her head to pet her for a moment.
I had no idea how I was going to prevent something like that from happening. For all I knew, I was sentencing everybody to permanent death via the execution of their souls by refusing to roll over for Sara and by giving Lucy his nickname. I could already feel my heart rate increasing as worry after worry began stacking up within my mind, but I shut my eyes and remembered what I was told before.
“Listen, kid. Your past doesn’t mean shit. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care where you’re from, and I don’t care who popped you out of their cunt. All that matters is where you are now. All that matters is who you want to be starting on this day. Do you want to be some snot-nosed brat who cries every damn time something doesn’t go your way? Somebody who devalues their own worth because of who their parents are? A European? Or do you want to inherit the spirit of the country you’re in now and be somebody worth being proud of? You can cling to your past and be a miserable little shit for the rest of your life, or you can take control and be the man who I know you want to be. You wouldn’t have come here if you didn’t have it in you.”
He placed his hand on my head, and I never felt such warmth before then.
“That’s the spirit. Let’s start with some woodworking. A man who can’t build his own chair doesn’t deserve the luxury of sitting.”
I held my hand over my heart and took a deep breath to relax. “Those who don’t fight for their dreams will never reach them. Even if it’s something as simple as winning the lottery, you’re never going to win it unless you take that first step and buy a ticket. So, let’s refuse to let anybody other than us determine what happens to our souls. They’re our property which means we get to say what we do with them, and nobody else has the right to regulate our property. Understand?”
Between my words and the petting, Enna cheered up and nodded. “Yes!”
“Good. Now, let’s go help the others.” I figured that would be a good way of passing the time while our units were on the move. There wasn’t much to do until they were done.
I woke up to the sensation of my skull trying to split itself into two. I thought the country splitting up over the civil war was bad, but that couldn’t compare to how my head felt. Every throb of the headache brought with it pain to force my eyes shut.
It was no simple hangover after whatever Thad gave me to drink, either. I was trained to be immune to hangovers.
The cause of the pain was obvious considering what I was worried about before going to sleep.
I didn’t have my meds. I took those multiple times a day like clockwork. Once in the morning, once at noon, and then again before bed. The last time I took them was the previous day’s morning before the tournament. That meant I probably went about twenty-four hours without them already, and that was apparently enough for some withdrawal symptoms to kick in.
Getting up, I sat on the side of my bed and rubbed my head to try and get rid of the pain if only by a little. “What? You can’t handle going a single day without some drugs?” I asked myself. “I feel like some kind of addict like this. Well, at least this headache might distract me from worrying.”
“W-worry about what? Is something wrong?” a familiar voice asked, almost making me jump.
But I was trained to never jump in surprise. It is a sign of weakness akin to rolling onto your back and showing your belly to the wolf wanting to tear it apart.
Thad only managed to make me jump the previous night because I was so lost in my doubts and worries that I failed to live up to my own standards. That aside, when I looked up to see who it was who asked me that question, I saw Enna standing there ready for another day of work. “When’d you get in here?” I asked her.
“Do—do you not recall me waking you up?” Enna asked me.
I shook my head. “Can’t say I do.”
“I attempted to wake you up an hour ago, but you groaned and told me to go away. Then I came back thirty minutes ago, and you mumbled something about manifest destiny. Ten minutes ago, you told me five more minutes. Five minutes ago, you told me another five more minutes. Do… do you need five more?”
“Manifest destiny, huh?” I yawned and stood up despite that headache doing everything in its power to stop me. “I have no idea what I must have been thinking or dreaming when I said that. Personally, I’m not a fan of taking away other’s freedoms in a mad grab for land.”
“Are… those things somehow connected?”
“Right. I still need to give you some history lessons. Anyways, to answer your first question, I’m fine.”
“Are you sure? I want to take your word for it, but…”
“I’m fine in the ways that matter and that’s all that’s important. How’s everybody doing today? Any news?”
Enna looked hesitant to move on but nodded and did so. “Both of our units have finished moving to their destinations and have three more movement points available to them, so it is possible to discover two of our neighboring regions today! Unless we discover one that wraps around in such a way to be on both our south and northwest border.”
“Is that all?”
“For now, yes!”
A gust of wind shook the tent and lifted up the entrance flap enough for the sun to come through, making me squint my eyes as that sharp pain in my head dug even digger into my brain. Going outside was going to be miserable, but I had to do it. I wasn’t about to sit around inside all day, especially while others were busy working.
Moving the units could be done before leaving the tent, though, just to buy me a bit more time in the shade.
I ordered both of the military units to continue moving toward the unexplored borders and then looked at Enna again. There was one more topic on my mind before I could devote my attention to the game. “Do you have any idea what happened to Sara?”
“A-ah… well, she… was already dealt with once this morning,” Enna answered.
“What do you mean by that?”
“She came to the camp and demanded that we fetch food and water for her. I… I was going to, but Thad told me that you wouldn’t let her order me around, so I shouldn’t let her, either. Hearing that was enough to make her leave again.”
“Sounds like she really can’t handle others not rolling over for her.’
“Well, she is a daughter of Luc—”
“—y.”
“Ri-right. You still insist on calling him that?”
“Of course. It’s his name.”
“Well, that aside… considering that she is his daughter, she has been taken care of her entire life by countless servants. Disobeying any request from her was enough to warrant permanent death.”
“As opposed to temporary death?”
Enna nodded. “Death of the physical body is only temporary. The soul survives. Should the soul itself be destroyed, though, then that is permanent death with no return from.”
“And she’s gotten people’s souls destroyed for disobeying her orders?”
Enna shook her head that time. “Nobody has ever been foolish enough to disobey her, but it has happened with her other siblings. Well… nobody has ever been foolish enough to disobey her until you. It is entirely possible that all of our actions here may result in our souls’ executions upon return to Hell.”
“I won’t let that happen.”
She still looked worried about it, so I placed a hand on her head to pet her for a moment.
I had no idea how I was going to prevent something like that from happening. For all I knew, I was sentencing everybody to permanent death via the execution of their souls by refusing to roll over for Sara and by giving Lucy his nickname. I could already feel my heart rate increasing as worry after worry began stacking up within my mind, but I shut my eyes and remembered what I was told before.
“Listen, kid. Your past doesn’t mean shit. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care where you’re from, and I don’t care who popped you out of their cunt. All that matters is where you are now. All that matters is who you want to be starting on this day. Do you want to be some snot-nosed brat who cries every damn time something doesn’t go your way? Somebody who devalues their own worth because of who their parents are? A European? Or do you want to inherit the spirit of the country you’re in now and be somebody worth being proud of? You can cling to your past and be a miserable little shit for the rest of your life, or you can take control and be the man who I know you want to be. You wouldn’t have come here if you didn’t have it in you.”
He placed his hand on my head, and I never felt such warmth before then.
“That’s the spirit. Let’s start with some woodworking. A man who can’t build his own chair doesn’t deserve the luxury of sitting.”
I held my hand over my heart and took a deep breath to relax. “Those who don’t fight for their dreams will never reach them. Even if it’s something as simple as winning the lottery, you’re never going to win it unless you take that first step and buy a ticket. So, let’s refuse to let anybody other than us determine what happens to our souls. They’re our property which means we get to say what we do with them, and nobody else has the right to regulate our property. Understand?”
Between my words and the petting, Enna cheered up and nodded. “Yes!”
“Good. Now, let’s go help the others.” I figured that would be a good way of passing the time while our units were on the move. There wasn’t much to do until they were done.
