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Published at 2nd of December 2021 10:57:10 AM


Chapter 46

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Chapter 46 – Recognition

After packing up, Fengning put on the hooded cloak that Long San had brought along and covered up her neck.  She looked left and right and after feeling satisfied, she skipped over to open the door.  As she walked out she turned her head turned back to look at Long San and said.  “Your Second Brother is a petty devil and you’re a jealous devil…….”

Before she could finish the sentence, out of the corner of her eyes, she noticed someone standing in front of her and almost bumped head-on into the person.  She immediately stopped and looked…….it was the petty devil that she just mentioned!

Long Er glared at her with a dark face and Fengning stared back at him.

Long Er said.  “Impudent.”

Fengning could not accept it and muttered under her breath.  “Petty…….”

Long San quickly cut her off and called out.  “Second Brother.”

Long Er was still staring at Fengning and said.  “Long San, you have to teach this one in your family well and proper.  She shouldn’t reveal whatever is on her mind, understand what should be said and what should be hidden, behave with propriety, and learn how to deal with people.”

Before he could finish speaking, Fengning was already unhappy and said.  “But you didn’t keep it hidden either.  Since you don’t like me and if you have any comments, you should have spoken to your brother in private but you spoke out in front of me.  Is this what you call knowing how to deal with people?  You scolded me loudly for being impudent but when I said that you’re petty, I lowered my voice, so I acted with more propriety than you!”

Long Er was almost choked by her words.  He narrowed his eyes and said.  “If you still want to be my Long Family’s daughter-in-law, you’d better curb your temper.”

“I’m not spending my life with you, so why should you be concerned about my temper?”

Fengning was annoyed.

Obviously, it is Long San who is clinging to her but why does it seem as though she is pestering Long San now?  She wants to be Long San’s wife, but she doesn’t like others to speak of her in this manner.

“Feng’er…….”  Long San understood her temper and quickly put his arms around her shoulders to pacify her.

“Second Brother is worried that your temper is too straightforward and won’t be able to adapt to the complicated relationship between our family and the outside world.  You are the Third Madam Long, so naturally, you will have to entertain.  Being too frank and too obvious will hurt you easily.”

Fengning retorted.  “I’ve been married into the Long Family for three years, there had never been any complicated relationship or hypocritical entertainment.  Everyone including Third Master Long doesn’t even know that he had married a wife, I……”

She suddenly had a thought……if that is the meaning, then does it mean that they are acknowledging her as Third Madam Long?

She looked at Long Er who had a stern expression on his face.

“I have already told Long San that everyone must be home for the New Year.  Bring the child back.  Our Long Family has always celebrated our reunion.  Eldest Brother and Eldest Sister-in-law will also be coming home this year.  Even since you lost your memory, you still haven’t met them.”

For a moment, she was stunned.

Return home for the New Year?  The Long Mansion is her home?  Are they willing to acknowledge her as a member of the Long Family?  Does it mean that she can now publicly identify herself as a member of the Long Family?

At this moment, Fengning suddenly felt like crying.  After such a long time since she woke up to find herself with amnesia, it was the first time that she felt moved because she had finally received recognition and acceptance.

 

Fengning and Long San were rushing to Fuyang City in a carriage and she was feeling very happy all along the way.

“Long San, Second Uncle has now acknowledged me as a member of the Long Family and he had also mentioned that Bao’er can return for the New Year.”

She no longer remembered that she had made excuses refusing to be Long San’s wife nor how much she had hated Long Er.

Long San was hugging her and smiling as he replied.  “Right, right, you’re part of our Long Family.”

Fengning said again.  “I don’t remember how I used to celebrate the New Year.  When I ran away with Bao’er, I never thought that in the future, I would have a family to celebrate the New Year with.”

“Now do you know the impulsive mistake you made?”  Long San seized the opportunity to educate her.

She glared at him.  “What mistake?”

“You aren’t even clear about your own matters and you ran away with the child.  Bao’er is still so young and can’t even feed and take care of herself.  In addition, you haven’t looked after a child before.  If this behavior of yours is not considered willful and impulsive, then what is?”

She bit her lip and knew that Long San was right but she was unwilling to accept it.

“They were planning to send my child away and give her away to other people.  Bao’er’s mother is still alive, so how can Bao’er be bullied like that?  As long as I am alive, I won’t allow Bao’er to live such a life.”

“Wife……”  Long San felt his heart aching as he stroked her hair.  “You still need others to take care of you.  When you took Bao’er with you, both mother and child had to suffer so much hardship.  What you didn’t know was that when I first saw the both of you performing on the street, I felt so sad.”

Fengning said in a soft voice.  “I would rather starve myself than let Bao’er go hungry but other people won’t do the same.  If the child is not their own, they won’t feel the heartache.  If they give Bao’er away to other people, what is the use even if they are willing to pay for her expenses? “

She did not know why she was so worked up and her voice became louder and louder as she spoke.

“I won’t let my child be an orphan.  Being an orphan is very pitiful.  Not to mention, she won’t have full meals, won’t have enough clothes to keep her warm, and the most unbearable thing is that she has to live her days looking at other peoples’ faces*.  Everyone will look down on her, everyone will bully her……I know what those days are like………”

(Live her days looking at other peoples’ faces means that she has to live each day depending on other peoples’ moods or fancies.) 

Suddenly she stopped as countless broken and messy images were churning through her mind but she was unable to see any one of them clearly.  She felt so dizzy that her face turned pale and was so frightened that she held on to her head.

Long San was startled and hugged her in his arms.

“What’s the matter?  Where do you feel unwell?”

Fengning could not speak and with her eyes shut she buried her head in Long San’s arms for a long while.

Long San was very anxious and asked again.  “What’s the matter?”

She simply slumped down, rested on his lap, and said weakly.

“Just now, my mind was in a mess and I was about to recall something but there were so many images appearing all at once so I didn’t see any of them clearly.”

Long San’s body stiffened and Fengning snuggled into his arms again.

“I’m alright now, I only felt slightly dizzy.  I’ll be fine after resting for a while.”

Long San’s face had turned pale.  When she turned over she instantly saw his complexion and hurriedly shook his hand.

“I’m really fine.  It’s just that I felt very dizzy just now, but I’m alright now, so don’t worry.”

“Mm……”  He responded.  “It’s alright if you’re fine……..  It’s alright if you’re fine.”

His broad palm was caressing her face and Fengning looked at him with a worried expression.  She felt a sweetness in her heart as she rubbed her face against his palm.

“Long San, don’t worry.  I had thought over this matter a long time ago.  Regardless of whether the past can be recalled or not, everyone is worried about the future.  Instead of being afraid of the future that we know nothing about, it’s better to work harder and turn it into a vision that we yearn for.  Doesn’t that saying remind us that as long as you treat others sincerely, you will be rewarded?  Look, I was kind to you before and now I have been rewarded.”

After thinking about it, she felt immeasurably self-satisfied and patted the back of his hand.  Her squinted eyes and smug smile were indescribably cute and he lowered his head to kiss her cheek.  He rested his head against her head and said softly.

“Feng’er, you must remember this.  Now I am treating you very sincerely with all my heart and in the future, no matter what happens, you mustn’t blame me or abandon me.”

She felt a little itchy in her ears and wrinkled her nose.

“That won’t do.  The range of ‘no matter what happens’ is too great, so I can’t guarantee.  You have to be very, very nice to me, otherwise, I will despise you and Bao’er won’t like you either.”

“So strict?  I’m so scared.”  Long San complained in a low voice and his words sounded like he was joking with her which made her laugh.

 

This time, the journey back was slower than the time when Fengning went.  Both of them traveled for three days before they finally returned to their small courtyard in Fuyang City.

When Bao’er heard Fengning’s voice, she ran out on her short legs. “Mother!…….Mother!”

Fengning immediately scooped up the little child into her arms.

“Bao’er, did you miss Mother?”

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With her small lips curled slightly, Bao’er was about to burst into tears as she kept calling.  “Mother!…..Mother!……..”

Fengning imitated her expression, curled her lips, and said.  “Alright, I understand.”

Long San who was standing at the side smiled silently while Fengning showed off to him and said.  “It means she misses me……is that right Bao’er?”

Bao’er was very cooperative and nodded while she was still chanting loudly.  “Mother!…..Mother!……..”

“Aiya…….this is disastrous.”  Fengning pretended to be surprised.  “I had only left for a few days but why is my little foolish baby unable to speak anymore?”

She tickled Bao’er on her sensitive spot and Bao’er giggled as she hugged her head shyly.

“Mother!…..Mother!……..”

After playing around noisily for a while, she finally said a complete sentence.  “Bao’er missed you.”

Fengning was so happy that she gave Bao’er a loud smack on her cheek.  Bao’er hugged her neck tightly refusing to let go and clung to her.

Long San who was standing at the side said.  “I remember when I was leaving, there was a baby who clung to me and was unwilling to let me leave but now that I’m back, no one is bothered with me.”

Bao’er called out sweetly.   “Uncle!……”

He snatched Bao’er from Fengning then let her sit on his arm and said.  “Bao’er is a good girl.”

Bao’er nodded seriously and repeated.  “Bao’er is a good girl.”

Bao’er made Long San very happy and she said.  “Uncle…….Bao’er will be better than other babies.”

He understood what she meant.  The little child just wanted to strive for more love and his heart started to ache for her.

“I know……I know Bao’er is the best.”  He touched her small face and saw the expectant look in her eyes.  He said softly.  “Bao’er, Uncle will be your Father, alright?  Father will love you very, very much just like how much your mother loves you.”

Bao’er widened her eyes and inhaled in surprise then turned her head around to look at Fengning.  When Fengning saw her like this, she could not contradict him.

Long San said again.  “Bao’er will be like other children.  She has a father, a mother, and many people who will love her.”

Bao’er looked at Fengning then turned to look at Long San and said.  “Mother……”   Then she turned around to look at Fengning and said.  “Father……”

This time, Long San frowned.  “Feng’er, in the future, you must remind me not to leave Bao’er for too long.  This child has indeed become foolish.”

Bao’er widened her eyes to look at the two adults back and forth and then finally, she spoke in an orderly manner.  “Mother……Father says I can call him Father…..I have a father now.”

The two adults looked at each other and burst into laughter.

Fengning touched Bao’er’s small head and said.  “This silly child talks in segments when she gets excited.”

“Bao’er wants to talk……can’t talk quickly.”  Her childish explanation made the two adults laugh again.

 

On this day, Long San took the mother and daughter to the restaurant for a delicious dinner which made them very happy.  Bao’er kept turning to him and called him ‘Father’ non-stop.  At the dinner, they also told Bao’er that they would be going home together for the New Year.

Bao’er had no impression of the New Year and Long San explained to her while hugging her.

“It’s the time when you put on new clothes, tie your hair with a new hair string, buy lots and lots of playthings that Bao’er likes and there will be lots of delicious food and snacks that Bao’er can’t get to eat on normal days.”

Before Bao’er could express her happiness, Fengning quickly pulled her over and taught her the most important thing.

“During the New Year, the most important thing is to get your Second Uncle to give you New Year money*.”

(New Year money – Giving New Year money is the traditional annual custom of the Han people.  The money is wrapped up with red paper and given to the younger generation as a blessing and to ward off evil spirits.  Now in modern times, this New Year money is given out in red envelopes to the younger generation as well-wishes .)

Long San almost choked on the sip of tea in his mouth but Bao’er had caught the most important word – ‘money’.  She pulled out the copper coin that she wore around her neck and asked.  “Is it this money?”

Fengning wanted to reply ‘Yes’ then thought it was not right since the silly child only recognized this worthless ‘money’……..and it would be too easy on Long Er.

“No, it’s not this kind of money but the other kind that is a silver nugget.”

Bao’er did not have a lot of chance to see the small pieces of silver and frowning, she tried hard to imagine how a silver nugget would look like.

Fengning slapped Long San’s arm and gestured to him.  “Hurry up, take out a silver nugget to show Bao’er.”

Long San smiled.  “Feng’er, don’t be mischievous.”

AD

She glared at him.  “For my child not to know how a silver nugget looks like will be a lifelong hindrance to her.  Hurry up!  Now there’s finally a chance to celebrate the New Year, therefore, Bao’er must learn to earn money.”

Bao’er knows about the matter of earning money.  She had always heard the adults talking about earning money and had witnessed Fengning working hard performing on the streets, so she hurriedly followed up with the conversation and said.  “Father, Bao’er wants to earn money.”

Long San helplessly took out his money bag and fished out a piece of silver.  He placed it on the table and said to Bao’er.  “Bao’er, my good baby, you’re too young to earn money but it’s not a bad thing for you to know what a silver nugget looks like.  To be able to recognize silver is good enough but you don’t have to think about earning money.”

Fengning ignored him and taking the silver nugget, she placed it in Bao’er’s hand.

“Look Bao’er, a silver nugget looks like this.  It’s a small lump and silver in color.  During the New Year when it’s time to ask for New Year money, you should ask your Second Uncle for this.”

Bao’er studied it carefully.

After thinking for a while, Fengning added again.  “If this is bigger, it’s even better.  It doesn’t have to be this small.”

Bao’er nodded as if she understood.





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