< Translated at Blessed Empyrean wordpress. >
“Is that so? But everyone else says we don’t look like mother and son at all.”
Khalid responded to Renato’s words in surprise. Objectively, in terms of appearance, he had no resemblance to Jamila. So Khalid didn’t like his face very much. His pitch-black hair and red eyes, the proof of his royal blood, as well as his overall appearance resembled the previous King whom he did not want to call father.
“No…… Your smiling face is exactly the same as hers?”
Renato, alternating his gaze between Jamila in the portrait and Khalid’s face, confidently said. As he looked at the portrait again, the softly curved corners of the eyes and the refreshingly raised lips when smiling were identical to Khalid’s.
“Well, if Your Imperial Highness feels so, it must be true.”
Their smiles resembled each other? Feeling he had learned something new, Khalid touched his lip corners. Until now, he had never thought that his and Jamila’s smiles were similar. Renato was the first to say that.
“……Did I smile often?”
“Pardon?”
“No, it was nothing. I was just talking to myself…… Then please offer your greetings to my mother.”
Realizing he had unknowingly mumbled aloud, Khalid changed the topic and took a step back. Then he picked a nearby flower and gave it to Renato. Seeing Renato receive the flower and stand in front of the altar with a nervous expression, he was lost in thoughts again.
As he recalled, he didn’t smile that often. During childhood, he was criticized for being an illegitimate child, and after his name was put on the Royal Genealogy, he lived alternately between the enemies-filled royal palace and bloody battlefields, so was there anything to smile about?
But recently, he seemed to have smiled quite often. It was mostly because of Renato. Khalid felt a refreshing surprise at that sudden realization.
Because Khalid didn’t want to scare Renato for no reason, because he wanted to calm him who was suffering from painful memories, because the way he worked hard at anything was commendable, because his pure and innocent actions were cute…… In the end, for whatever reason, he was always with Renato when he smiled.
Khalid thought maybe Renato was more familiar with his smile than himself. Perhaps no one among all his acquaintances saw Khalid’s smile more often than Renato.
Perhaps that was why Renato found his resemblance to Jamila that even Nasir and Amavand didn’t realize in the past few years. The moment he had that thought, a nostalgic voice reached his ears.
‘One day, someone who loves everything about you will appear.’
……Mother? Surprised, Khalid escaped from his thoughts and turned to Jamila’s portrait. Although it wasn’t possible, he momentarily felt as if she was talking to him. He vacantly stared at Jamila who had a gentle smile just like usual, engulfed in strange emotions.
Meanwhile, Renato carefully placed the flower in front of Jamila’s portrait, closed his eyes and paid silent tribute. He felt regretful for coming here to greet her while being awkward with Khalid like this. He inwardly apologized to Jamila. After the brief greeting, he opened his eyes to see Khalid gloomily staring at the portrait.
“……”
Not calling Khalid, Renato quietly closed his mouth. He thought he shouldn’t disturb Khalid spending time with his mother after a long while. When Renato was wondering whether to step aside, Khalid turned to him first.
“Did you finish your greeting?”
“Pardon? Ah, yes. But I don’t know if I did it properly.”
“I’m sure you did well. My mother must have been happy too.”
“Do you think so?”
“Of course, my mother wanted me to get married more than anyone else.”
Khalid slightly raised the corners of his lips, answering in a low voice. His red eyes, darker than usual, still had lingering emotions.
‘I want you to know the happiness of loving someone and being loved by someone.’
Recalling the earnest wish Jamila had whispered to him several times, Khalid smiled bitterly. She was always worried that her son would be left alone when she departed.
So she hoped he could build a proper family unlike her. She wanted someone who would stand by Khalid’s side until the very end, even if the entire world turned its back on him. Someone who would love and cherish him as much as himself, no, more than he himself.
Mother, it’s not the type of marriage you want, but I still have a person whom I can think of as my family. A person who values and respects me, who worries me because he keeps trying to give me something, and who seems to stand by me no matter what happens, just like your wish.
Offering a silent prayer to Jamila, Khalid inwardly spoke to her. Even if they may part ways after three years, Khalid was certain he would never meet someone as devoted to him as Renato. With that, the strange sentiment he felt on the engagement day came back to Khalid’s heart.
“……Should we go back? They must have finished arranging the belongings by now.”
Khalid closed his eyes and reopened them to sort out his unnamed emotions. They would only stay at the grand prince’s mansion for one day. Tomorrow, they would return to the royal palace’s guesthouse. Since they didn’t have a lot of luggage, the arrangement must have finished quickly. After briefly thinking, he softly smiled at Renato and held out his hand.
Renato, however, couldn’t immediately take Khalid’s hand. His gaze was drawn to the man’s first smile of today. Is he not angry anymore? Or……
“Your Imperial Highness?”
Khalid tilted his head, puzzled when Renato only looked at him without holding his hand. Then, just like someone who realized something, he uttered an exclamation that sounded like a sigh. Afterward, he withdrew the hand reaching out to Renato.
No.
Seeing Khalid’s hand moving away again, Renato felt his heart race. The man just made eye contact with him and smiled, so they couldn’t go back to being awkward again. He didn’t know if Khalid would accept his apology, but he had to pluck up his courage now. Renato hurriedly opened his mouth.
“Excuse me……”
“I……”
They opened their mouths at the same time as if promised. Their gazes also met in the air. Khalid momentarily widened his eyes, then abashedly gestured to Renato.
“Please speak first.”
“No, please speak first.”
Renato hurriedly waved his hand, yielding priority to Khalid. He wanted to apologize to Khalid, so he needed to hear what the man would say first. The two had a brief squabble over who would speak first. In the end, Khalid brought up what he wanted to say first.
“I want to apologize for what happened last night.”
“Pardon?”
The words spoken by Khalid were completely unexpected to Renato. While he was perplexed, the sincere apology continued to reach his ears.
“I think I was a little excited yesterday. We each have our own ways, but I didn’t respect Your Imperial Highness and only imposed my thoughts on you. I am sorry for the disrespect.”
Finishing his words, Khalid bowed his head politely toward Renato. The royals didn’t have to humble themselves when they made mistakes. Still, Khalid bowed his head and apologized to Renato. He was as formal as he could. He did so out of regret about what happened last night.
“Your, your highness……”
Renato was at a loss for what to do when Khalid bowed his head and apologized to him. He should be the one to apologize and not Khalid.
“Please don’t do this, I don’t deserve your highness’ apology……”
“I regretted it all night. I couldn’t resist a moment’s wrath and pressed Your Imperial Highness. I shouldn’t have done that.”
If he didn’t want Renato to overwork to the point of getting hurt and sacrificing for Khalid or others, he should have persuaded Renato and not gotten angry with him. Khalid later regretted it. Ashamed of himself for being swayed by his emotions, he felt as if he was going crazy.
At the same time, he felt that he couldn’t help it. After all, no one had ever shaken him as much as Renato did.
He had lost count of how many times his composure, never broken even in situations that could lead to his immediate demise, collapsed in front of Renato. Khalid felt as if he had met a very powerful natural enemy. Someone he could never win against.
“Still, I hope that Your Imperial Highness won’t force yourself. I hope you will care for yourself more.”
After a bit of hesitation, Khalid expressed his sincerity just like last night. He was certainly angry and disheartened because of Renato, but he was much more worried and apologetic than that.
Unable to sleep all night, Khalid agonized over and over again about how he should convey his thoughts to Renato. As a result, he missed the timing to apologize several times.
At the luncheon and on the way to the grand prince’s mansion, Khalid knew that Renato was conscious of him. But it was strangely difficult for him to talk just like usual. Khalid was also perplexed by himself.
If the other person had been Nasir or Amavand, he could have acted as if nothing had happened yesterday. But he couldn’t do so to Renato. He was cautious with his words, fearing that he would repeat the same mistake as yesterday or that he would deny Renato’s method again if done wrong.
For that reason, Khalid tried to sort out his complicated mind before talking to Renato again in a calm state.
However, no matter how much he thought, he couldn’t figure out how to bring it up or what to say. And Khalid wasn’t very good with words in the first place. So he decided to convey his true feelings even if they were just unembellished words.
< Translated at Blessed Empyrean wordpress. >
“Is that so? But everyone else says we don’t look like mother and son at all.”
Khalid responded to Renato’s words in surprise. Objectively, in terms of appearance, he had no resemblance to Jamila. So Khalid didn’t like his face very much. His pitch-black hair and red eyes, the proof of his royal blood, as well as his overall appearance resembled the previous King whom he did not want to call father.
“No…… Your smiling face is exactly the same as hers?”
Renato, alternating his gaze between Jamila in the portrait and Khalid’s face, confidently said. As he looked at the portrait again, the softly curved corners of the eyes and the refreshingly raised lips when smiling were identical to Khalid’s.
“Well, if Your Imperial Highness feels so, it must be true.”
Their smiles resembled each other? Feeling he had learned something new, Khalid touched his lip corners. Until now, he had never thought that his and Jamila’s smiles were similar. Renato was the first to say that.
“……Did I smile often?”
“Pardon?”
“No, it was nothing. I was just talking to myself…… Then please offer your greetings to my mother.”
Realizing he had unknowingly mumbled aloud, Khalid changed the topic and took a step back. Then he picked a nearby flower and gave it to Renato. Seeing Renato receive the flower and stand in front of the altar with a nervous expression, he was lost in thoughts again.
As he recalled, he didn’t smile that often. During childhood, he was criticized for being an illegitimate child, and after his name was put on the Royal Genealogy, he lived alternately between the enemies-filled royal palace and bloody battlefields, so was there anything to smile about?
But recently, he seemed to have smiled quite often. It was mostly because of Renato. Khalid felt a refreshing surprise at that sudden realization.
Because Khalid didn’t want to scare Renato for no reason, because he wanted to calm him who was suffering from painful memories, because the way he worked hard at anything was commendable, because his pure and innocent actions were cute…… In the end, for whatever reason, he was always with Renato when he smiled.
Khalid thought maybe Renato was more familiar with his smile than himself. Perhaps no one among all his acquaintances saw Khalid’s smile more often than Renato.
Perhaps that was why Renato found his resemblance to Jamila that even Nasir and Amavand didn’t realize in the past few years. The moment he had that thought, a nostalgic voice reached his ears.
‘One day, someone who loves everything about you will appear.’
……Mother? Surprised, Khalid escaped from his thoughts and turned to Jamila’s portrait. Although it wasn’t possible, he momentarily felt as if she was talking to him. He vacantly stared at Jamila who had a gentle smile just like usual, engulfed in strange emotions.
Meanwhile, Renato carefully placed the flower in front of Jamila’s portrait, closed his eyes and paid silent tribute. He felt regretful for coming here to greet her while being awkward with Khalid like this. He inwardly apologized to Jamila. After the brief greeting, he opened his eyes to see Khalid gloomily staring at the portrait.
“……”
Not calling Khalid, Renato quietly closed his mouth. He thought he shouldn’t disturb Khalid spending time with his mother after a long while. When Renato was wondering whether to step aside, Khalid turned to him first.
“Did you finish your greeting?”
“Pardon? Ah, yes. But I don’t know if I did it properly.”
“I’m sure you did well. My mother must have been happy too.”
“Do you think so?”
“Of course, my mother wanted me to get married more than anyone else.”
Khalid slightly raised the corners of his lips, answering in a low voice. His red eyes, darker than usual, still had lingering emotions.
‘I want you to know the happiness of loving someone and being loved by someone.’
Recalling the earnest wish Jamila had whispered to him several times, Khalid smiled bitterly. She was always worried that her son would be left alone when she departed.
So she hoped he could build a proper family unlike her. She wanted someone who would stand by Khalid’s side until the very end, even if the entire world turned its back on him. Someone who would love and cherish him as much as himself, no, more than he himself.
Mother, it’s not the type of marriage you want, but I still have a person whom I can think of as my family. A person who values and respects me, who worries me because he keeps trying to give me something, and who seems to stand by me no matter what happens, just like your wish.
Offering a silent prayer to Jamila, Khalid inwardly spoke to her. Even if they may part ways after three years, Khalid was certain he would never meet someone as devoted to him as Renato. With that, the strange sentiment he felt on the engagement day came back to Khalid’s heart.
“……Should we go back? They must have finished arranging the belongings by now.”
Khalid closed his eyes and reopened them to sort out his unnamed emotions. They would only stay at the grand prince’s mansion for one day. Tomorrow, they would return to the royal palace’s guesthouse. Since they didn’t have a lot of luggage, the arrangement must have finished quickly. After briefly thinking, he softly smiled at Renato and held out his hand.
Renato, however, couldn’t immediately take Khalid’s hand. His gaze was drawn to the man’s first smile of today. Is he not angry anymore? Or……
“Your Imperial Highness?”
Khalid tilted his head, puzzled when Renato only looked at him without holding his hand. Then, just like someone who realized something, he uttered an exclamation that sounded like a sigh. Afterward, he withdrew the hand reaching out to Renato.
No.
Seeing Khalid’s hand moving away again, Renato felt his heart race. The man just made eye contact with him and smiled, so they couldn’t go back to being awkward again. He didn’t know if Khalid would accept his apology, but he had to pluck up his courage now. Renato hurriedly opened his mouth.
“Excuse me……”
“I……”
They opened their mouths at the same time as if promised. Their gazes also met in the air. Khalid momentarily widened his eyes, then abashedly gestured to Renato.
“Please speak first.”
“No, please speak first.”
Renato hurriedly waved his hand, yielding priority to Khalid. He wanted to apologize to Khalid, so he needed to hear what the man would say first. The two had a brief squabble over who would speak first. In the end, Khalid brought up what he wanted to say first.
“I want to apologize for what happened last night.”
“Pardon?”
The words spoken by Khalid were completely unexpected to Renato. While he was perplexed, the sincere apology continued to reach his ears.
“I think I was a little excited yesterday. We each have our own ways, but I didn’t respect Your Imperial Highness and only imposed my thoughts on you. I am sorry for the disrespect.”
Finishing his words, Khalid bowed his head politely toward Renato. The royals didn’t have to humble themselves when they made mistakes. Still, Khalid bowed his head and apologized to Renato. He was as formal as he could. He did so out of regret about what happened last night.
“Your, your highness……”
Renato was at a loss for what to do when Khalid bowed his head and apologized to him. He should be the one to apologize and not Khalid.
“Please don’t do this, I don’t deserve your highness’ apology……”
“I regretted it all night. I couldn’t resist a moment’s wrath and pressed Your Imperial Highness. I shouldn’t have done that.”
If he didn’t want Renato to overwork to the point of getting hurt and sacrificing for Khalid or others, he should have persuaded Renato and not gotten angry with him. Khalid later regretted it. Ashamed of himself for being swayed by his emotions, he felt as if he was going crazy.
At the same time, he felt that he couldn’t help it. After all, no one had ever shaken him as much as Renato did.
He had lost count of how many times his composure, never broken even in situations that could lead to his immediate demise, collapsed in front of Renato. Khalid felt as if he had met a very powerful natural enemy. Someone he could never win against.
“Still, I hope that Your Imperial Highness won’t force yourself. I hope you will care for yourself more.”
After a bit of hesitation, Khalid expressed his sincerity just like last night. He was certainly angry and disheartened because of Renato, but he was much more worried and apologetic than that.
Unable to sleep all night, Khalid agonized over and over again about how he should convey his thoughts to Renato. As a result, he missed the timing to apologize several times.
At the luncheon and on the way to the grand prince’s mansion, Khalid knew that Renato was conscious of him. But it was strangely difficult for him to talk just like usual. Khalid was also perplexed by himself.
If the other person had been Nasir or Amavand, he could have acted as if nothing had happened yesterday. But he couldn’t do so to Renato. He was cautious with his words, fearing that he would repeat the same mistake as yesterday or that he would deny Renato’s method again if done wrong.
For that reason, Khalid tried to sort out his complicated mind before talking to Renato again in a calm state.
However, no matter how much he thought, he couldn’t figure out how to bring it up or what to say. And Khalid wasn’t very good with words in the first place. So he decided to convey his true feelings even if they were just unembellished words.
