“……You mean the Prince.”
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Maryam easily knew who Khalid was talking about. There was no way she couldn’t have known. Still, she was a bit shocked.
The two were quite affectionate toward each other unlike other marriages formed for political purposes, but she never predicted that Khalid would want to dedicate his sword to Renato. Didn’t it seem like Khalid had no intention of breaking up with him?
“You’re right. Now, my family is His Imperial Highness, Prince Renato.”
At least while I’m still with him. Khalid held back those words and looked at Maryam with unwavering eyes. He had been thinking about quitting being Maryam’s knight since he decided not to live the way he used to. That thought became more resolute as he stayed with Renato.
“I want to be faithful to him, just like how noonim lives for Her Majesty the Queen Consort and his highness the royal prince.”
Maryam deeply inhaled at the declaration expressing his strong will. She could understand why Khalid was saying so.
Maryam did not keep Khalid in check from the very beginning. Shortly after ascending to the throne, she and Khalid had no major problems. It was only after Queen Consort Laila became pregnant that Maryam’s attitude blatantly changed.
To Maryam who was tired of the unstable royal authority and the continuing political conflict, her one and only companion’s pregnancy was no different from a ray of light in the darkness.
Knowing so, Khalid also understood Maryam’s change of heart. As one couldn’t like all others equally, he adapted to the changed relationship, thinking that Laila and the child would be more important and precious to Maryam than him.
For that reason, he could now proudly declare this. Just like how Maryam did, he would prioritize Renato over her.
“So if noonim asks for help in the future, I don’t think I can help you like before. I hope you will understand my decision.”
“Khalid……”
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“Ah, please don’t worry if you’re concerned about the controversy following. It won’t be a big problem, as I dedicated my sword to noonim but didn’t take the knight’s oath.”
Khalid added some words to ease her concern. When a knight wanted to serve a liege, they dedicated their sword or made an oath. Of course, there was a difference between simply dedicating their sword and making a knight’s oath.
Most of the knights did not hesitate to dedicate their swords, but they were very careful about making an oath. It was because if they made a knight’s oath, they wouldn’t be able to change their liege until death. They had to unconditionally obey that person’s orders even if it was against chivalry. Even when it involved treason or going against their beliefs.
As a result, most knights formed a liege-vassal relationship by dedicating their swords without an oath. After that, they would spend some time with the ones they chose, and if the knights felt that their beliefs were aligned with each other or sincerely wished to devote their allegiance, they would take the knight’s oath.
Conversely, if they were disappointed with their lieges or judged that they could no longer serve, they would get back the sword and find a new liege.
Like other knights, Khalid dedicated his sword to Maryam but did not take the oath. His wish to serve her as his liege was not a lie, but he had a bit of hesitation.
He occasionally felt guilty for not dedicating the knight’s oath to Maryam as his liege, but he felt fortunate now. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to make up his mind to dedicate his sword to Renato.
“That is all I want to say.”
Having nothing more to say, Khalid closed his mouth. Now that he had conveyed his intention, he only needed to hear Maryam’s answer.
“……I understand your intention. Do as you please.”
Maryam twitched her lips, speechless at Khalid’s determined attitude, then consented to it with a heavy sigh. There was a faint resignation in her low, subdued voice. How could she possibly stop Khalid from doing what he wanted?
“Knight Khalid Nur Hakan, kneel before your liege.”
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Maryam got up from her seat after regaining her composure. Then, she commanded Khalid in a solemn voice. It was time to give freedom to her brother, who had been hurt by her greed in the past.
“I, Maryam Nur Hakan, will accept the request of Khalid Nur Hakan, who was the most loyal sword of all, return the sword I received from him, and give him his freedom.”
Maryam gently placed her hand on Khalid’s head as he knelt in front of her and bowed his head. And she briefly declared the end of their liege-vassal relationship.
“I am deeply grateful for my liege’s mercy. I, Khalid Nur Hakan, will take back the sword that I once dedicated to Maryam Nur Hakan.”
As a result, a string connecting him and Maryam was broken. Feeling the heat in his throat, Khalid thanked her. From his slightly opened lips, a muffled voice as if submerged in water rang out.
But he wasn’t as sad as he had been worried. Rather, his heart felt refreshed as if a burden he carried for a long time had been put down. Perhaps because he had changed his mindset.
Khalid felt the change of heart that had occurred to him. Just a few months ago, he was upset by Maryam’s wary behavior, but he did not dare to willingly cut ties with her.
He would’ve broken off long ago had it been someone else, but unfortunately, it wasn’t the case for Maryam. To Khalid, Maryam was his only family member left in the world. It made him indecisive.
As an illegitimate grand prince, a knight called the Red-Eyed Slaughterer, and a precious dominant Alpha, many people considered Khalid different or special for various reasons. However, just like anyone else, he could also feel lonely and afraid.
Khalid couldn’t decisively sever his relationship with Maryam because of the thought that he would be truly alone if he cut off the ties with her.
From a very young age, he couldn’t erase the thought that he was a ‘stranger’. That thought only got worse when Jamila died and he became a royal prince.
Not wanting to show his weakness to those hostile to him, Khalid didn’t express it outwardly, but he suffered from extreme loneliness. To him as a child, the royal palace was a desolate prison with no one to lean on.
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Khalid felt like a float wandering along the river, unable to stay in one place. It was Maryam who took hold of Khalid. She treated her half-brother whom everyone despised as her family and not a stranger.
To Khalid who was unable to take root anywhere, Maryam was like an anchor that held him firmly. So even when she changed, he still couldn’t let go of his foolish lingering feelings.
But it wasn’t the case anymore. Khalid was no longer obsessed with Maryam. Just as she had a new family, he also had another person to take root in.
Renato.
Recalling his fiancé who was delicate but more strong-willed than anyone else, Khalid’s lips gently curled up. It was all thanks to Renato that he was able to change.
“I’m no longer noonim’s knight, but…… to me, you are always a precious family member. I just want you to know that.”
Saying goodbye to the past he was holding onto foolishly, Khalid raised his head and relaxedly smiled at Maryam.
“……So do I. Just because you’re not my knight doesn’t mean you aren’t my brother.”
“Thank you for saying so.”
Frozen at the sight of Khalid smiling refreshingly, Maryam looked down at him with complicated eyes. Feeling that it was her turn, she slowly opened her lips. It was time to apologize to Khalid.
“I’m sorry.”
“……Pardon?”
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“I’m sorry for using you as much as I please so far, for not trusting you despite that, and for hurting you because of that.”
Khalid’s eyes widened because of Maryam’s sudden apology. Maryam smiled bitterly at him, who stiffened in surprise. Then, she knelt on one knee like Khalid and made eye contact with him.
“Khalid. To me, you are the best brother. I probably wouldn’t have ascended the throne had it not been for you. And yet, instead of being thankful, I was suspicious and envious of you. Seriously……”
Maryam, momentarily overwhelmed with emotions, bit her lower lip. Since her last conversation with Renato, she had reflected on every single thing she had done to Khalid. And she was deeply remorseful.
No matter how bad the situation was and how much she was mentally cornered, what she had done was repay good with evil.
‘Respecting his highness and giving him complete freedom – that is what I want. He is not a tool to do whatever you want, Your Majesty.’
‘I hope Your Majesty will remain a good noonim to his highness until the end.’
Maryam also felt guilty toward Khalid originally. However, she tried to ignore the mistakes she had made, rationalizing that it was inevitable.
Then, Renato clearly pointed that out. He mercilessly exposed Maryam’s true nature, pointing out her flimsy self-rationalization and crafty cowardice.
Receiving a huge blow from Renato, Maryam decided to sincerely apologize to Khalid before it was too late. She could no longer evade her wrongdoings.
“I’m sorry for being a terrible older sister, Khalid.”
The first step in her atonement was a sincere apology. Maryam apologized to Khalid, hoping that she could convey her regret and shame, guilt and repentance at least a bit. At this moment, she was not a country’s monarch, but a person’s older sister.
“……You mean the Prince.”
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Maryam easily knew who Khalid was talking about. There was no way she couldn’t have known. Still, she was a bit shocked.
The two were quite affectionate toward each other unlike other marriages formed for political purposes, but she never predicted that Khalid would want to dedicate his sword to Renato. Didn’t it seem like Khalid had no intention of breaking up with him?
“You’re right. Now, my family is His Imperial Highness, Prince Renato.”
At least while I’m still with him. Khalid held back those words and looked at Maryam with unwavering eyes. He had been thinking about quitting being Maryam’s knight since he decided not to live the way he used to. That thought became more resolute as he stayed with Renato.
“I want to be faithful to him, just like how noonim lives for Her Majesty the Queen Consort and his highness the royal prince.”
Maryam deeply inhaled at the declaration expressing his strong will. She could understand why Khalid was saying so.
Maryam did not keep Khalid in check from the very beginning. Shortly after ascending to the throne, she and Khalid had no major problems. It was only after Queen Consort Laila became pregnant that Maryam’s attitude blatantly changed.
To Maryam who was tired of the unstable royal authority and the continuing political conflict, her one and only companion’s pregnancy was no different from a ray of light in the darkness.
Knowing so, Khalid also understood Maryam’s change of heart. As one couldn’t like all others equally, he adapted to the changed relationship, thinking that Laila and the child would be more important and precious to Maryam than him.
For that reason, he could now proudly declare this. Just like how Maryam did, he would prioritize Renato over her.
“So if noonim asks for help in the future, I don’t think I can help you like before. I hope you will understand my decision.”
“Khalid……”
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“Ah, please don’t worry if you’re concerned about the controversy following. It won’t be a big problem, as I dedicated my sword to noonim but didn’t take the knight’s oath.”
Khalid added some words to ease her concern. When a knight wanted to serve a liege, they dedicated their sword or made an oath. Of course, there was a difference between simply dedicating their sword and making a knight’s oath.
Most of the knights did not hesitate to dedicate their swords, but they were very careful about making an oath. It was because if they made a knight’s oath, they wouldn’t be able to change their liege until death. They had to unconditionally obey that person’s orders even if it was against chivalry. Even when it involved treason or going against their beliefs.
As a result, most knights formed a liege-vassal relationship by dedicating their swords without an oath. After that, they would spend some time with the ones they chose, and if the knights felt that their beliefs were aligned with each other or sincerely wished to devote their allegiance, they would take the knight’s oath.
Conversely, if they were disappointed with their lieges or judged that they could no longer serve, they would get back the sword and find a new liege.
Like other knights, Khalid dedicated his sword to Maryam but did not take the oath. His wish to serve her as his liege was not a lie, but he had a bit of hesitation.
He occasionally felt guilty for not dedicating the knight’s oath to Maryam as his liege, but he felt fortunate now. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to make up his mind to dedicate his sword to Renato.
“That is all I want to say.”
Having nothing more to say, Khalid closed his mouth. Now that he had conveyed his intention, he only needed to hear Maryam’s answer.
“……I understand your intention. Do as you please.”
Maryam twitched her lips, speechless at Khalid’s determined attitude, then consented to it with a heavy sigh. There was a faint resignation in her low, subdued voice. How could she possibly stop Khalid from doing what he wanted?
“Knight Khalid Nur Hakan, kneel before your liege.”
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Maryam got up from her seat after regaining her composure. Then, she commanded Khalid in a solemn voice. It was time to give freedom to her brother, who had been hurt by her greed in the past.
“I, Maryam Nur Hakan, will accept the request of Khalid Nur Hakan, who was the most loyal sword of all, return the sword I received from him, and give him his freedom.”
Maryam gently placed her hand on Khalid’s head as he knelt in front of her and bowed his head. And she briefly declared the end of their liege-vassal relationship.
“I am deeply grateful for my liege’s mercy. I, Khalid Nur Hakan, will take back the sword that I once dedicated to Maryam Nur Hakan.”
As a result, a string connecting him and Maryam was broken. Feeling the heat in his throat, Khalid thanked her. From his slightly opened lips, a muffled voice as if submerged in water rang out.
But he wasn’t as sad as he had been worried. Rather, his heart felt refreshed as if a burden he carried for a long time had been put down. Perhaps because he had changed his mindset.
Khalid felt the change of heart that had occurred to him. Just a few months ago, he was upset by Maryam’s wary behavior, but he did not dare to willingly cut ties with her.
He would’ve broken off long ago had it been someone else, but unfortunately, it wasn’t the case for Maryam. To Khalid, Maryam was his only family member left in the world. It made him indecisive.
As an illegitimate grand prince, a knight called the Red-Eyed Slaughterer, and a precious dominant Alpha, many people considered Khalid different or special for various reasons. However, just like anyone else, he could also feel lonely and afraid.
Khalid couldn’t decisively sever his relationship with Maryam because of the thought that he would be truly alone if he cut off the ties with her.
From a very young age, he couldn’t erase the thought that he was a ‘stranger’. That thought only got worse when Jamila died and he became a royal prince.
Not wanting to show his weakness to those hostile to him, Khalid didn’t express it outwardly, but he suffered from extreme loneliness. To him as a child, the royal palace was a desolate prison with no one to lean on.
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Khalid felt like a float wandering along the river, unable to stay in one place. It was Maryam who took hold of Khalid. She treated her half-brother whom everyone despised as her family and not a stranger.
To Khalid who was unable to take root anywhere, Maryam was like an anchor that held him firmly. So even when she changed, he still couldn’t let go of his foolish lingering feelings.
But it wasn’t the case anymore. Khalid was no longer obsessed with Maryam. Just as she had a new family, he also had another person to take root in.
Renato.
Recalling his fiancé who was delicate but more strong-willed than anyone else, Khalid’s lips gently curled up. It was all thanks to Renato that he was able to change.
“I’m no longer noonim’s knight, but…… to me, you are always a precious family member. I just want you to know that.”
Saying goodbye to the past he was holding onto foolishly, Khalid raised his head and relaxedly smiled at Maryam.
“……So do I. Just because you’re not my knight doesn’t mean you aren’t my brother.”
“Thank you for saying so.”
Frozen at the sight of Khalid smiling refreshingly, Maryam looked down at him with complicated eyes. Feeling that it was her turn, she slowly opened her lips. It was time to apologize to Khalid.
“I’m sorry.”
“……Pardon?”
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“I’m sorry for using you as much as I please so far, for not trusting you despite that, and for hurting you because of that.”
Khalid’s eyes widened because of Maryam’s sudden apology. Maryam smiled bitterly at him, who stiffened in surprise. Then, she knelt on one knee like Khalid and made eye contact with him.
“Khalid. To me, you are the best brother. I probably wouldn’t have ascended the throne had it not been for you. And yet, instead of being thankful, I was suspicious and envious of you. Seriously……”
Maryam, momentarily overwhelmed with emotions, bit her lower lip. Since her last conversation with Renato, she had reflected on every single thing she had done to Khalid. And she was deeply remorseful.
No matter how bad the situation was and how much she was mentally cornered, what she had done was repay good with evil.
‘Respecting his highness and giving him complete freedom – that is what I want. He is not a tool to do whatever you want, Your Majesty.’
‘I hope Your Majesty will remain a good noonim to his highness until the end.’
Maryam also felt guilty toward Khalid originally. However, she tried to ignore the mistakes she had made, rationalizing that it was inevitable.
Then, Renato clearly pointed that out. He mercilessly exposed Maryam’s true nature, pointing out her flimsy self-rationalization and crafty cowardice.
Receiving a huge blow from Renato, Maryam decided to sincerely apologize to Khalid before it was too late. She could no longer evade her wrongdoings.
“I’m sorry for being a terrible older sister, Khalid.”
The first step in her atonement was a sincere apology. Maryam apologized to Khalid, hoping that she could convey her regret and shame, guilt and repentance at least a bit. At this moment, she was not a country’s monarch, but a person’s older sister.
