Chapter 70
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Today, as always, the postcard of a perfect happy house was stifling. Even though Violette has become accustomed to it, it does not mean that she no longer feel this uncomfortable feeling. It just means that she has developed a way to tolerate and endure it.
And today, she feels 30% more suffocated than usual. Perhaps it’s because of the discomfort of having her heart being crushed, but she is having a hard time just chewing and swallowing. This discomfort feels similar to when she gets …… heartburn.
“Are you listening to me, Violette?”
“…… yes.”
They aren’t allowing her even a shred of escapism. They usually don’t notice what Violette is doing, but at times like this, they are so perceptive that she hates it. She doesn’t want to use a blindfold now, she already plugged her ear out of their discussion, but it’s frankly the most depressing thing she has ever experienced.
Violette wants them to think that she is being sincere even if it’s a little messy. She is certainly not listening properly. She is just hearing them through one ear and sliding them the other. And she is also trying to erase her sense of presence as much as possible. In her previous life, she would bite back at every word and reply with triple the bitterness she was feeling, resulting in a huge fight that would always get out of her hand. Violette has neither the energy nor the strength to go to such trouble now.
“You are not at all …… impressed by Mary’s example. Shame on you for being an older sister and inferior to your younger sister.”
“I’m sorry.”
If they are satisfied with just uttering emotionless canned sentences, there is no reason for them to sacrifice her self-esteem and self-affirmation. In the first place, her emotions had been beaten to a pulp so many times that it is only to be expected that they would be broken now. And the more those emotions are broken, the more she looses all sensations. In a way, it is very easy and comfortable to stay in despair. But if she stayed too long, she’ll want to die, but Violette is sure she will manage to fix it before that happens.
Don’t worry, I’ve always done that. I have been broken, crushed, and sometimes killed my emotions and feelings many times before. A dead heart doesn’t stop beating, because it never beats in the first place. With a little care, it can be used again, at the expense of a little pain.
“Father, you can’t talk like that!”
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Today, as always, the postcard of a perfect happy house was stifling. Even though Violette has become accustomed to it, it does not mean that she no longer feel this uncomfortable feeling. It just means that she has developed a way to tolerate and endure it.
And today, she feels 30% more suffocated than usual. Perhaps it’s because of the discomfort of having her heart being crushed, but she is having a hard time just chewing and swallowing. This discomfort feels similar to when she gets …… heartburn.
“Are you listening to me, Violette?”
“…… yes.”
They aren’t allowing her even a shred of escapism. They usually don’t notice what Violette is doing, but at times like this, they are so perceptive that she hates it. She doesn’t want to use a blindfold now, she already plugged her ear out of their discussion, but it’s frankly the most depressing thing she has ever experienced.
Violette wants them to think that she is being sincere even if it’s a little messy. She is certainly not listening properly. She is just hearing them through one ear and sliding them the other. And she is also trying to erase her sense of presence as much as possible. In her previous life, she would bite back at every word and reply with triple the bitterness she was feeling, resulting in a huge fight that would always get out of her hand. Violette has neither the energy nor the strength to go to such trouble now.
“You are not at all …… impressed by Mary’s example. Shame on you for being an older sister and inferior to your younger sister.”
“I’m sorry.”
If they are satisfied with just uttering emotionless canned sentences, there is no reason for them to sacrifice her self-esteem and self-affirmation. In the first place, her emotions had been beaten to a pulp so many times that it is only to be expected that they would be broken now. And the more those emotions are broken, the more she looses all sensations. In a way, it is very easy and comfortable to stay in despair. But if she stayed too long, she’ll want to die, but Violette is sure she will manage to fix it before that happens.
Don’t worry, I’ve always done that. I have been broken, crushed, and sometimes killed my emotions and feelings many times before. A dead heart doesn’t stop beating, because it never beats in the first place. With a little care, it can be used again, at the expense of a little pain.
“Father, you can’t talk like that!”
Today, as always, the postcard of a perfect happy house was stifling. Even though Violette has become accustomed to it, it does not mean that she no longer feel this uncomfortable feeling. It just means that she has developed a way to tolerate and endure it.And today, she feels 30% more suffocated than usual. Perhaps it's because of the discomfort of having her heart being crushed, but she is having a hard time just chewing and swallowing. This discomfort feels similar to when she gets heartburn.Are you listening to me, Violette? yes.They aren't allowing her even a shred of escapism. They usually don't notice what Violette is doing, but at times like this, they are so perceptive that she hates it. She doesn't want to use a blindfold now, she already plugged her ear out of their discussion, but it's frankly the most depressing thing she has ever experienced.Violette wants them to think that she is being sincere even if it's a little messy. She is certainly not listening properly. She is just hearing them through one ear and sliding them the other. And she is also trying to erase her sense of presence as much as possible. In her previous life, she would bite back at every word and reply with triple the bitterness she was feeling, resulting in a huge fight that would always get out of her hand. Violette has neither the energy nor the strength to go to such trouble now.You are not at all impressed by Mary's example. Shame on you for being an older sister and inferior to your younger sister.I'm sorry.If they are satisfied with just uttering emotionless canned sentences, there is no reason for them to sacrifice her self-esteem and self-affirmation. In the first place, her emotions had been beaten to a pulp so many times that it is only to be expected that they would be broken now. And the more those emotions are broken, the more she looses all sensations. In a way, it is very easy and comfortable to stay in despair. But if she stayed too long, she'll want to die, but Violette is sure she will manage to fix it before that happens.Don't worry, I've always done that. I have been broken, crushed, and sometimes killed my emotions and feelings many times before. A dead heart doesn't stop beating, because it never beats in the first place. With a little care, it can be used again, at the expense of a little pain.Father, you can't talk like that!
