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Paradis de Fou - Chapter 4

Published at 29th of December 2018 06:51:47 AM


Chapter 4

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So, Peg.

Jed's most faithful companion and 'system.' I previously mentioned that he can 'summon' modern-day objects like toothpaste, toothbrush and mouth-fresheners, didn't I (in chapter 2). Actually, that's not it. he can't 'summon' things. I mean, YOU can't summon things. You summon spirits, ghosts, heroes from other worlds, devils and even gods, but not 'things.' And our little guy Peg too can't summon things. He vomits them.

. . .

Actually, Jed's real system is not Peg. Nope! It's a female god named Athena, who is his system. In reality, she is a very enigmatic person, whose first two words to Jed was, "Useless human."

Athena only spoke to Jed once, right during when transmigrating and her words were in layman's terms were, "Sh*tty human and dirty dog, I can't handle both of you, I've enough already for my plate and don't need your bullsh*t. Go fetch your own stick in the wide world. Thank you, over and out, Athena."



So, in other words, Athena left Jed and Peg to fend for themselves in this new world all by themselves. Without a single OP skill, knowledge or whatsoever. Jed's best friend and OP system became Peg. And being a system, Peg had both his advantages and disadvantages. Firstly, advantages. According to Peg, which is probably false anyway, he and Jed's world's are completely different. In his world, the world was met with complete annihilation and it was only Peg who survived. At the end, some kind of miracle happened, which gave Peg supreme power to stop the Apocalypse but instead of stopping it, he used that entire power to swallow up his world. His reason. "If the world's gonna die, might as well kill it myself."

Good point there, Peg.

And that became his OP skill in the world of Audenia. His power was that, in his small 30 cm body, there lies an entire world's worth of armaments, structure, weapons and ammunition. Not only that, he also 'miraculously' knows every bits and pieces of information that humankind has ever known. Starting from stone axes to nuclear bombs, artillery and interstellar travel. Wait! Interstellar travel! Well, that's the prove that his and Jed's worlds are different. In short, he has the material and the methods of modern Earth, which is very OP in my sense, but there is a catch to it.

It is true that Peg has everything in his stomach and he can vomit it all out, but how? How can a neck as small as you can possibly imagine it, can vomit the Empire State Building? Or any big guns, material or assets. He can vomit only small things like torchlights, sunglasses, rings, earplugs and if possible, pistols. And most importantly, don't even think about electronics. There's no electricity in the world of Audenia and definitely no internet. The only things which Jed could pull out of Peg's mouth were, a Winchester model shotgun, a nazi 1940 helmet with a fading swastika, a torchlight with bunch of fully charged batteries in them, few pairs of sunglasses and earplugs. He sold all of the jewelries he could get his hands on, but it seems that the people of Audenia, or at least people of Eastern Continent are more interested in jewelries and accessories which increase their cultivation along with their beauty. Not just simple bullcrap jewelries. Adding to that is Peg's limbs and fingers or toes. Being a dog, Peg has many limitations like he can't hold things properly, write something meaningful and scatter food around when eating. The only good thing, he can do is probably running away at the first sign of danger.

You might also wonder about ammunition but Jed had it covered in this part. You see, being a rogue, you can't simply walk to a weapon shop and ask for it. The most Jed could do, is get gunpowder to make bullets, himself. Unfortunately, in the Mie City and various other cities, gunpowder isn't easily available, but what was available was saltpeter. And therefore, after getting a little help from Master Peg, Jed learnt to make gunpowder from saltpeter and then makes bullet.

The second-most important thing is knowledge. Since, Peg has the entire knowledge about humankind of 'his' Earth, you might think Jed can rock the entire world of Audenia, isn't it?

Unfortunately, that won't be happening. It is also found that the world of Audenia is no stranger to simple gunpowder and their armors are adapted to take gunshots. It is true that not all people are 'armored' but even then, 'normal' bullets and gunpowder don't work in here. The gunpowder which rocks the world of Audenia is magic-infused saltpeter and gunpowder, found in the Western Continent. It is only because of THAT did the Western Continent was able to stop all the Central Continent's invasion. The same sword and bullet theory, only there is an additional magic applied to it.

Anyway, leaving the apparent gunpowder-ineffectiveness of the world as a whole, there is another problem. And the problem is Jed, himself. As it happens to be, Jed never took his schooling or college seriously and was a gaming-man through and through. The thing is, what games say and tell isn't all the truth. If you play a game completely and if happens to be a shooting game, doesn't means that you are the best shooter. And that's what exactly what happened to Jed. He had played a hell lot of games which focused on 'crafting' stuffs but at the end, it never told him how it happened. The computer programs did it and so, he never cared. Therefore, at the end of the day, Jed thought he knew it but he did not. and that's what happened when Peg vomited a bunch of random stuff at him and told him to 'surprise.' The result. Horrible! There are very few things that Jed can make it himself and one of them is making shotgun ammo. Other than that, there is nothing 'modern' about his knowledge.



Jed and Peg left the He clan estate after collecting their Merit Points. The sky was pretty bad and sad today with dark clouds looming over. It seemed that a downpour was en route. Jed picked up Peg, placed his on his head and put on his hood to cover both of them. After that, they headed towards the place where the Adventure Guild was there. The Rosalina streets.



The Adventure Guild. A sovereign body composed of adventurers and explorers whose sole purpose is to supply them with booze in their adventures and get them drunk just before they go out, so that they get wasted by some weird-eyed hairy monster. Nah! Just kidding. The Adventure Guild is in reality a Central Continent organization, whose sole purpose is simply to … explore. And to solve local problems. It started just as a small set-up of retired soldiers, who were bored with serving the Crowns and Princes. So, they instead became battle-sweepers. They rallied a small group of moderately armed men and started cleaning the battlefields. Their loots which were usually broken armors, weapons and arrows. Their finds helped the nations they were serving a lot by cutting some losses and even though, they were jealous of their unintended gains, they didn't stop them. Partly because all of their hands were full on war.

Soon, words spread and other nations started copying such tactics. With the then Adventure Guild facing problem and competition, they opted out instead of fighting back. Instead, they started doing small things on the rural sides, keeping wild animals in check, hunting monsters and helping out a crisis. These acts made them famous and increased the weights of their pockets slowly and steadily. Again, when words got out, people started copying them and they too, again opted out. Like this, they took a career and left it half-way for an entire century. When their competitors were finally tired and empty-handed, the Adventure Guild were still full of energy and their coffers as deep as an empire's. When the time got right, the members of the Adventure Guild staged up a coup and became the most powerful and financial Guild in the entire world of Audenia. No other Guild could ever rise again beyond the Adventure guild.

Now, they have their own empire. The Lyuevans Empire and most empires and continents accept them as a friend. So, did Huyan Empire and the Mie City and that's why there is an Adventure Guild.



The Adventure Guild of Mie was situated in the Rosalina streets. These streets are a bit special because it is also the place where the Black-Market is located, just a bit underground. It is a public fact and also one of the most important 'tourist' place of Mie City. The Rosalina Streets are also famous for their spice market which is held every week on Saturday and the rusty peddling stalls which are known for their rare antiquities.

Jed and Peg were masters of these streets. He is currently 14 years old but he has been walking these streets for almost 6 years now. He knows the ins and outs and the correct methods to evade all the disturbing and disgusting guys. After all, no matter this or the previous world, humans are still the same and all of them still have strange fetishes. Cannibalism.

Not necessarily that all people who inhabit the Black-Markets are cannibals but the numbers are definitely higher than in Earth. Starvation, depression and desperation make people do many things and cannibalism is nothing new here. But thankfully, the street leading upto the Guild is always safe and sound, because there are hundreds of quests for finding missing persons and slaying cannibals, you know. And the adventurers are anything but sweet souls. They never let a Gold leave their grasp, whatever that may be.

It took Jed and Peg nearly half-an-hour to reach the Guild, which looked exactly like a rammed-up 1800s American cowboy salon. The only thing missing was a title 'Wild West.' But instead, there was a 'Wild Jug,' so …. It really doesn't matter. Anyway, the Adventure Guild is absolutely like one of the cowboy salons so popularized in games and it even had a push-open floppy door. It was made entirely out of wood and iron, with a slanting roof and three chimneys poking right out of it. It kinda looked out-of-place in this eastern setting.

Peg looked gloomily at the Guild and said, "Another hard day… sigh…"

Jed pursued his lips and nodded his head weakly, "Another day of being treated like a child. Gosh!"



Bam!

"Hella' guys!!!!!!"

Said Jed, bursting into the Guild and the moment he did, a huge smell of alcohol and beer wafted into his nose, almost making him swirl.

"Gosh! Is this the smell of beers or acid!!!" cried Peg as he tucked his head into Jed's jacket.

"God! Ah! But, don't you think this is somewhat lesser than usual." Said Jed sniffing the air with a disgusting face. Peg hid his head further into his jacket and said, "How could you in the first place smell this sh*t. I hate being born everytime I enter this damned place."

"Well then, welcome to the place, sh*tbags!" cried a waiter, nearly scaring the sh*t out of Peg. The waiter was a boy of around Jed's age but had dark blonde head and sleepy eyes. He was skinny but handy, as he was carrying nine bottles of wine on a single tray in one hand. As for the otherhand, he was scratching his ears with it. He was the only one around Jed's age and also one of the most get-along guy of the Guild.

"Oh! Hi there, Kev. Got something good on the menus?"

"You mean quests, right?"

"Hell ya! I'm not here for eating your god-cursed noodles or this run-down-sh*t ale—"

"THE 'LE'S GOO', BOY!!" shouted a drunk adventurer from the sides.

"A-ah! Yea, Pete. Anyway, Kev tell me the best job, you got here."

"Sigh…" The waiter named Kev sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "I seriously don't understand what 'best job' you are referring to but I can tell you that there is a big player in the Guild and he's mass-recruiting guys. If you up for it, then you can go and talk."

"Oh!" Jed cried in genuine surprise. It was hard for people, especially rich men, to not trust the shady low-ranking adventurers. In the Adventure Guild, there are clear-cut ranking and each ranking holds different meaning both for the quests, dignity, trust and efficiency of getting the job done. Rich men with more money and power WILL try to afford higher ranking adventurer simply for two reasons. 1. They are trustworthy. 2. They can get their butts kicked for running away from jobs.

"What kind of job are they issuing?" asked Jed, walking into the Guild-cum-tavern. But Kev just shook his head and replied, "Weird."



"Godly sh*t, man! I'm telling you that piece of crap Kevin is surely an otherworlder like us. I mean, he always jumps in right at the sweet spot. H-how can h-he—" cried out Peg from within Jed's jacket.

So, the deal here is a bit complicated. Peg believes that otherworlders like Jed and him can easily understand his words like Jed and fears that they might kidnap him and do something bad. Actually, the former part of the previous sentence is meaningful, since Athena did tell them that there were people in Audenia like Jed and Peg, who are otherworlders and even though she didn't mention on whether or not they can 'hear' Peg's words, it is highly likely. The latter part of the sentence that they would kidnap him is simply sh*t. No one's gonna kidnap Peg and I, as the author, guarantee that. Why? Because the guy who would even THINK about kidnaping Peg can be none other than Peg himself. And not only me, but even Jed believes that.

"Yea, yea, Peg. I got it." said Jed as he patted Peg's head.

"Don't you dare pet me, insolent being."

"Whatever! Hey, Kev, where's the dude you mentioned?" Jed asked Kev.

"Oh! Right over here…there! that's them!!" Kev pointed to a pair of men at the end of the hall, silently siting in the corner. Jed looked at them and was visibly shaken because the people he was spying wasn't simply normal people. Hell! Even royalties and nobilities would fade before them. Why? Because these pair of men were wearing black suites, black pants, black ties and black sunglasses. Adding to that, one of them was pale white while the other was pitch black. The black suit melted into him, almost making him a real man-in-black and the only thing that didn't made him fade into darkness was the white shirt he wore underneath his suit.

They looked trouble whether it be Audenia or Earth.

"O-h… Uh-oh! Peg!"

"What's the matter, dude? —Holy mother of—"

"Okay! We're running away!" Jed said and dashed towards the other direction. Kev seemed surprised and called him, alerting the black-suited men too. "Where are you going, Jed? What about the job?"

"Uh-huh…" Jed noticed the two men staring intently at Jed for a while, before turning away to talk something amongst themselves. Jed knew that he was in deep sh*t and so, he made a wrecked-up face and said, "Uh… toilet. My d-doodle is not feeling good today…. Can't take any job today, sorry man!"

"H-hey! Wait…. That's strange." Kev muttered as he saw Jed's lanky figure dash towards the exit. A slight smile spread on his face and he muttered, "Seems like Jed knows these black men. Curious, aren't you, Dear?!" A strange light spread over his face but only for a second or so. He regained his normal composure and walked back to his counter like nothing happened.



Jed dashed towards the exit but the throngs of drunkards all around made it incredibly difficult for him to get out. He pushed and tried to get out as little Peg inside his jacket, muttered inconspicuously, "Damn! Damn! Damn! These black men… these black men… are anything but good news. What do you think, Jed? Who's them? CIA, Men-in-Black, those weirdos from matrix? Who, Jed, who?!!"

"Oh! Shut up, muttie! I'm suffocating here and you're thinking about movies?"

"WHAZZ A MOFIES, KIDDO!!" muttered the same old drunkard adventurer, Pete but Jed just jabbed him away.

"Look, Peg! Just shut your mouth up or else—"

"Or else what?!!"

….




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