I don’t mind Sendai-san licking my feet, but I’m not in the mood for it. I think even Sendai-san is aware of that.
It’s not something I want to be done.
There is nothing I want to do.
I’m not in a bad mood, so there’s no way to make it better.
If you must say something, please do one thing.
「…That, untie it.」
I point to Sendai-san’s ponytail sitting on the floor of the common area.
「My hair?」
「Yes. Stop with the ponytail.」
「Does that put you in a better mood?」
「Untie it even if it doesn’t get better.」
I kicked Sendai-san in the knee with a casual remark, and without hesitation, she untied her hair.
「Is this good?」
「Not good. Your ears, get them out of sight.」
Sendai-san no longer has her hair in a ponytail, but she has her hair over her ears, so I can see the blue stone, which is also a sign that it is mine.
「…Why not? You should be able to see, right?」
Sendai-san says, looking a little dissatisfied.
「It’s not good, so make sure I can’t see it.」
There is no one here but me.
I am the only one who can see Sendai-san’s earrings, but she is mine even if I cannot see them. So now I don’t need to see the blue stones that adorn her ears. I think I should hide it along with the feelings inside me that I don’t want to see.
「Hurry up and do it.」
I kick Sendai-san in the knee again.
「Ouch.」
I heard an emotionless voice tell her,「If you don’t want to get kicked, do as I say,」and her visible ears were hidden.
「So, how’s your mood?」
「Just the usual.」
「And that’s the usual?」
「But it’s the usual.」
「I see.」
Sendai-san let out a small breath. Then she put her forehead on my knee and blurted out,
「…I don’t know what you’re thinking, Miyagi.」
「I also don’t know what you’re thinking, Sendai-san. Licking my feet to get me in a good mood is crazy.」
「Is it that crazy?」
I can’t see her face as she asks me a small question.
「You don’t have to lick it if you’re not ordered to.」
「It’s a Miyagi thing-ish act, right?」
I hear voices whose emotions are unreadable.
It’s a voice that is appropriate for Sendai-san, who doesn’t know what she’s thinking, but it’s also a voice that makes me wonder what she looks like now.
I want her to look up.
I want her to look me in the face and say.
But I can’t say it because if I see Sendai-san’s face right now, something bad might happen.
「Pervert.」
I said quietly and pinched Sendai-san’s whiskers.
「Give me an order. I’ll do whatever you say.」
Sendai-san would not look up. I could feel her body heat from my knees, but that was not enough to tell me anything.
「You don’t have to say it like that.」
「Is that an order?」
「An order. And stand in front of me with a normal face.」
「What kind of order is that?」
「You don’t have to mind what kind of orders I give you, just do what I say.」
「…Okay–okay.」
I am relieved that the voice I hear is back to her usual voice.
My forehead is separated from hers, and the warmth of her body on my lap is distant. But soon our fingertips are gently attached, and Sendai-san’s heat flows in again.
「I said stand up.」
「I know. I’ll follow your orders.」
I don’t expect her to listen to my orders, but all I can do now is give her. This is the closest we can get to “business as usual” without me inviting her to go out with me or to meet people I don’t want to meet.
「If you know what you’re doing, get up quickly.」
I said plainly, and Sendai-san stood up, as if it was too much trouble. Then she asks,「What’s next?」, but I have no intention of answering.
I silently get up from my chair. I gently put my face to Sendai-san’s neck and attach my lips to hers, returning the heat that flowed from my lap.
Once, twice.
I repeat kisses to the neck.
「You don’t mark them?」
「I’m not.」
I answered shortly and slowly pressed my lips against Sendai-san’s neck.
I don’t want to leave this day behind for Sendai-san.
That is why I didn’t make a mark.
Instead, I kissed her repeatedly, returning the body heat that Sendai-san gave me and taking it away again.
「Wouldn’t it be better to be in bed than here?」
Sendai-san, who says nothing but superfluous words, puts her arm around my back and pressed her shoulder.
「I didn’t mean it that way.」
One step away and step on Sendai-san’s foot.
「Then what do you mean?」
「…It doesn’t mean anything.」
「If it doesn’t make sense, make it and pretend it does.」
「Impossible.」
「Why is it impossible?」
She really only says extraneous things.
There is no deeper meaning to what I just did, nor do I intend to create one. Of course, there is no reason for the answer that it is impossible. I can’t be asked questions by me who only has what I don’t have. I have to shut her up like this.
「Shut up, Sendai-san.」
I press her stomach and think of ways to keep her from asking any more stupid questions. But nothing like that comes to mind right away.
Asking questions may help to shut down Sendai-san’s questions, but she may not answer them properly.
If that’s the case, then I’ll use the hot water from the electric kettle to make tea and kill time and Sendai-san’s chatter.
That’s what I thought, but my mouth moved of its own accord.
「…What is important to you, Sendai-san?」
Probably not what I’m asking here and now.
I know, but I don’t think I could ask if it wasn’t for a day like today.
「Important to me?」
It’s not that it can’t be predicted.
When Maika and I went out with the three of us, I heard the answer that led us to it. I remember her well because she always said she liked the same things I liked, but she said she “might like” things I didn’t like as much, and I know she was right.
Like studying.
To be precise, teaching study may be more important than what is important. Sendai-san likes teaching study, and she taught me too.
「Yes. Sendai-san’s important thing.」
Sendai-san stares at me and then drops her gaze to the floor.
No words.
No return of the gaze.
She continues to stare at the floor, not at me.
I don’t think what is important and what I like are equal, but if the answer is “tutoring students,” I don’t want to hear it.
Sendai-san’s “favorite thing” continues to smolder in my mind.
I still don’t hear any voices.
I had no choice but to look at the floor where Sendai-san was staring, and she blurted out.
「…It’s this place, I guess.」
It is a relief to hear a different word than the answer I don’t want to hear.
But I am also not convinced.
Even though it will be gone after graduation?
I almost say it aloud, but I stopped.
「What’s important to you, Miyagi?」
The question I asked Sendai-san came back to me, and I shifted my gaze to her from where we had spent quite a bit of time together, cooking and cleaning.
「——Hamburger.」
「Eh, hamburger?」
「Make it.」
「Now? I mean, what’s important to you?」
「I answered it.」
「You answered, but hamburgers aren’t important, they’re your favorite thing.」
Sendai-san kicks me in the leg, as if in disgust.
「They’re very similar.」
I’m not the only one who sometimes doesn’t answer questions properly. Sendai-san also sometimes gives me inappropriate answers, so it’s a win-win situation.
「Well, I don’t mind if it’s a hamburger. Miyagi, you really like those, don’t you? Hamburgers.」
「I don’t care about that, just make it.」
「I don’t have the ingredients.」
「Why don’t you just go buy them?」
「Then you should have told me earlier. I should have stopped by the supermarket.」
It may be too late to make hamburgers after going shopping. But I want to eat hamburgers today.
I really want to.
I don’t mind Sendai-san licking my feet, but I’m not in the mood for it. I think even Sendai-san is aware of that.
It’s not something I want to be done.
There is nothing I want to do.
I’m not in a bad mood, so there’s no way to make it better.
If you must say something, please do one thing.
「…That, untie it.」
I point to Sendai-san’s ponytail sitting on the floor of the common area.
「My hair?」
「Yes. Stop with the ponytail.」
「Does that put you in a better mood?」
「Untie it even if it doesn’t get better.」
I kicked Sendai-san in the knee with a casual remark, and without hesitation, she untied her hair.
「Is this good?」
「Not good. Your ears, get them out of sight.」
Sendai-san no longer has her hair in a ponytail, but she has her hair over her ears, so I can see the blue stone, which is also a sign that it is mine.
「…Why not? You should be able to see, right?」
Sendai-san says, looking a little dissatisfied.
「It’s not good, so make sure I can’t see it.」
There is no one here but me.
I am the only one who can see Sendai-san’s earrings, but she is mine even if I cannot see them. So now I don’t need to see the blue stones that adorn her ears. I think I should hide it along with the feelings inside me that I don’t want to see.
「Hurry up and do it.」
I kick Sendai-san in the knee again.
「Ouch.」
I heard an emotionless voice tell her,「If you don’t want to get kicked, do as I say,」and her visible ears were hidden.
「So, how’s your mood?」
「Just the usual.」
「And that’s the usual?」
「But it’s the usual.」
「I see.」
Sendai-san let out a small breath. Then she put her forehead on my knee and blurted out,
「…I don’t know what you’re thinking, Miyagi.」
「I also don’t know what you’re thinking, Sendai-san. Licking my feet to get me in a good mood is crazy.」
「Is it that crazy?」
I can’t see her face as she asks me a small question.
「You don’t have to lick it if you’re not ordered to.」
「It’s a Miyagi thing-ish act, right?」
I hear voices whose emotions are unreadable.
It’s a voice that is appropriate for Sendai-san, who doesn’t know what she’s thinking, but it’s also a voice that makes me wonder what she looks like now.
I want her to look up.
I want her to look me in the face and say.
But I can’t say it because if I see Sendai-san’s face right now, something bad might happen.
「Pervert.」
I said quietly and pinched Sendai-san’s whiskers.
「Give me an order. I’ll do whatever you say.」
Sendai-san would not look up. I could feel her body heat from my knees, but that was not enough to tell me anything.
「You don’t have to say it like that.」
「Is that an order?」
「An order. And stand in front of me with a normal face.」
「What kind of order is that?」
「You don’t have to mind what kind of orders I give you, just do what I say.」
「…Okay–okay.」
I am relieved that the voice I hear is back to her usual voice.
My forehead is separated from hers, and the warmth of her body on my lap is distant. But soon our fingertips are gently attached, and Sendai-san’s heat flows in again.
「I said stand up.」
「I know. I’ll follow your orders.」
I don’t expect her to listen to my orders, but all I can do now is give her. This is the closest we can get to “business as usual” without me inviting her to go out with me or to meet people I don’t want to meet.
「If you know what you’re doing, get up quickly.」
I said plainly, and Sendai-san stood up, as if it was too much trouble. Then she asks,「What’s next?」, but I have no intention of answering.
I silently get up from my chair. I gently put my face to Sendai-san’s neck and attach my lips to hers, returning the heat that flowed from my lap.
Once, twice.
I repeat kisses to the neck.
「You don’t mark them?」
「I’m not.」
I answered shortly and slowly pressed my lips against Sendai-san’s neck.
I don’t want to leave this day behind for Sendai-san.
That is why I didn’t make a mark.
Instead, I kissed her repeatedly, returning the body heat that Sendai-san gave me and taking it away again.
「Wouldn’t it be better to be in bed than here?」
Sendai-san, who says nothing but superfluous words, puts her arm around my back and pressed her shoulder.
「I didn’t mean it that way.」
One step away and step on Sendai-san’s foot.
「Then what do you mean?」
「…It doesn’t mean anything.」
「If it doesn’t make sense, make it and pretend it does.」
「Impossible.」
「Why is it impossible?」
She really only says extraneous things.
There is no deeper meaning to what I just did, nor do I intend to create one. Of course, there is no reason for the answer that it is impossible. I can’t be asked questions by me who only has what I don’t have. I have to shut her up like this.
「Shut up, Sendai-san.」
I press her stomach and think of ways to keep her from asking any more stupid questions. But nothing like that comes to mind right away.
Asking questions may help to shut down Sendai-san’s questions, but she may not answer them properly.
If that’s the case, then I’ll use the hot water from the electric kettle to make tea and kill time and Sendai-san’s chatter.
That’s what I thought, but my mouth moved of its own accord.
「…What is important to you, Sendai-san?」
Probably not what I’m asking here and now.
I know, but I don’t think I could ask if it wasn’t for a day like today.
「Important to me?」
It’s not that it can’t be predicted.
When Maika and I went out with the three of us, I heard the answer that led us to it. I remember her well because she always said she liked the same things I liked, but she said she “might like” things I didn’t like as much, and I know she was right.
Like studying.
To be precise, teaching study may be more important than what is important. Sendai-san likes teaching study, and she taught me too.
「Yes. Sendai-san’s important thing.」
Sendai-san stares at me and then drops her gaze to the floor.
No words.
No return of the gaze.
She continues to stare at the floor, not at me.
I don’t think what is important and what I like are equal, but if the answer is “tutoring students,” I don’t want to hear it.
Sendai-san’s “favorite thing” continues to smolder in my mind.
I still don’t hear any voices.
I had no choice but to look at the floor where Sendai-san was staring, and she blurted out.
「…It’s this place, I guess.」
It is a relief to hear a different word than the answer I don’t want to hear.
But I am also not convinced.
Even though it will be gone after graduation?
I almost say it aloud, but I stopped.
「What’s important to you, Miyagi?」
The question I asked Sendai-san came back to me, and I shifted my gaze to her from where we had spent quite a bit of time together, cooking and cleaning.
「——Hamburger.」
「Eh, hamburger?」
「Make it.」
「Now? I mean, what’s important to you?」
「I answered it.」
「You answered, but hamburgers aren’t important, they’re your favorite thing.」
Sendai-san kicks me in the leg, as if in disgust.
「They’re very similar.」
I’m not the only one who sometimes doesn’t answer questions properly. Sendai-san also sometimes gives me inappropriate answers, so it’s a win-win situation.
「Well, I don’t mind if it’s a hamburger. Miyagi, you really like those, don’t you? Hamburgers.」
「I don’t care about that, just make it.」
「I don’t have the ingredients.」
「Why don’t you just go buy them?」
「Then you should have told me earlier. I should have stopped by the supermarket.」
It may be too late to make hamburgers after going shopping. But I want to eat hamburgers today.
I really want to.
