I had nothing against hamburgers, but my resentment is growing.
Miyagi has not returned yet.
That is the reason why I’m turning my negative feelings toward hamburgers, simply put, I am taking it out on them. If I delve further into these feelings, I can trace them back to her friend.
Utsunomiya Maika sells hamburgers.
To be precise, she works part-time at a fast food restaurant, and Miyagi informed me that she was going to stop by that fast food restaurant before returning home.
I go from my room to the common area with my phone in hand and sit in the chair where Miyagi always sits.
Pictures taken at the school festival or at the zoo.
And pictures taken in this house.
My phone is full of Miyagi and I never get tired of looking at it. I am frustrated by the lack of Miyagi, but I can live with it. I really want to see the real Miyagi, not the one in my phone, but I can’t help what isn’t there.
I let out a big breath.
I didn’t expect to see Miyagi as soon as I got back from college, but it was no fun to hear that she was going to make a side trip. Moreover, the destination is Utsunomiya’s part-time job.
There was no call to go out for dinner.
But Miyagi will probably have a hamburger.
To be correct, what she will eat is a hamburger that Utsunomiya sells at her part-time job. A patty sandwiched between a bun is called a hamburger, but a patty made of ground meat is very similar to a hamburger, so I think it can be thrown into the same category as a hamburger.
I find Miyagi’s detour so uninteresting that I want to think about this nonsense endlessly, and I want to take it out on the hamburger.
I know it is a pointless act.
「What should I make for dinner?」
I am not very hungry, but it is time to prepare dinner. But it’s too much trouble to cook.
No matter how elaborate I make something, it will not taste good without Miyagi. If nothing I eat tastes good, I may as well settle for cup noodles. I feel like I’m being Miyagi-fied at times like this, but cup noodles is quick and easy to prepare, and there are no dishes to wash. It’s perfect for when I’m feeling unmotivated.
「I don’t remember if there was stock of those.」
The other day, when I came home from a part-time job, I saw Miyagi eating a cup noodles. I think that was the last one, or maybe not. My memory is kind of fuzzy, so I put my phone down and check the shelves.
「There’s nothing here.」
I exhale and sit down again in my chair at Miyagi.
If only Miyagi had come home, I wouldn’t have been discouraged by a problem as small as whether or not I had a cup of ramen. I would really hate it.
It is okay for me to be late for my part-time job, but not for Miyagi to be late for her friend’s part-time job.
I can’t help but be disillusioned by the fact that I have such selfish feelings, but I have been stuck in my selfish feelings ever since I met Miyagi. And the feelings are definitely growing and getting out of hand.
After what happened to my family, I had stopped being obsessed or strongly interested in people, but only Miyagi is in a different frame of mind.
I had many friends in high school, but all of them were only superficial, and I can only remember treating them with a pasted-on smile.
When I met Mio in college, I sometimes think that she might become to me what “Utsunomiya is to Miyagi,” but that is all. Even though I was willing to get to know her better, I wasn’t able to deepen the depth of my relationship with her. The “friendships” associated with Mio were more bothersome than I wanted them to be.
Only Miyagi is special and only Miyagi is needed.
If I still want to live with Miyagi in this house, I need to keep going to college. If I stop going to college, my parents will stop paying for it. If I want to live with her beyond that, I need to find employment and money to maintain this place on my own, and I also need to continue to interact with people to some extent.
It is a hassle.
But even if it’s too much trouble, I can’t cut out everything but Miyagi.
And eating is also a necessary part of life.
It is really a hassle, but you should eat dinner.
I’ll have Miyagi buy something for me.
She always looks grumpy, but she will at least go shopping if I ask her to.
I take my phone from the table and send a message saying,『I’m too lazy to cook for one, so go buy something to replace dinner on your way home,』and I get an immediate response.
『What about my dinner?』
『I thought you were going to go eat a hamburger.』
When I return a question to a question, I don’t get a response.
I don’t know what was wrong, but something was wrong.
When I was wondering whether I should send a new message after finding out only such a vague thing, I received a rare phone call from Miyagi.
「I didn’t say anything about eating a hamburger.」
I hear a low, gruff voice coming from my phone.
「I thought you went to Utsunomiya’s part-time job?」
「Why do I have to eat hamburgers when I go to Maika’s?」
「Eh, because Utsunomiya sells hamburgers, right?」
「Sendai-san, if you go to a place that sells hamburgers, do you definitely eat hamburgers?」
The conversation is not engaging.
I’m just returning questions to questions and the conversation is parallel and there is no intersection. I know, but I’m back to returning questions to questions.
「You mean eating dinner at home?」
「Yes. Also, I’m here already.」
「Eh?」
The phone hangs up and I hear the front door open. And Miyagi soon appeared.
「I’m home.」
「Welcome back.」
I call out to Miyagi, who has returned earlier than expected, and she comes trotting over to me.
「…Sendai-san, that’s my seat.」
「Ah, sorry.」
I tried to stand up with my phone, but Miyagi steps on my foot and I cannot stand up. It was not bone-crushing, but she is grumpy and presses my feet against the floor with quite a bit of force.
「Miyagi, move your feet.」
「Dinner, what are you going to do?」
Miyagi says as she stomps on my foot.
「I’ll make something. Omelette with rice?」
「…It’s not hamburger?」
「Did you like the hamburger?」
「Omelette rice is fine. And I think I’ve been eating too many hamburgers lately.」
Miyagi looked neither disappointed nor happy and stepped away from me. Then she sat down on the other side of the table, in the chair I always use.
「Sendai-san, you don’t like hamburgers, do you? Why have you been making so many hamburgers lately?」
It’s an important thing for Miyagi.
That important thing is something I have been asked to make, and it is also connected to my memory. But no matter how many reasons I give, when I tell Miyagi that I like her, her mood turns sour.
The reason why I was making hamburgers is probably similar to that, so if I don’t want to make Miyagi’s mood any worse, I shouldn’t tell her. But then I would have to prepare another reason.
「If you suddenly want to eat it, it’s a hassle to go out and buy the ingredients. So, I thought, why not serve hamburgers so that you don’t ask for them all of a sudden?」
I don’t think it’s a good reason, but I can’t think of any other appropriate reason. I think she might say something. But Miyagi didn’t pursue the question further as to why I made hamburgers over and over again, and blurted out,
「You’re getting fat. I mean, I got fat. You serve too many hamburgers.」
「So, do you want to exercise with me?」
「You’re going to exercise, Sendai-san?」
「I’m doing it. I’m getting fat.」
「Sendai-san is getting fat too.」
Miyagi says in surprise.
「I’m going to get fat. What do you think I am?」
「I kind of thought it was always like that, even if you didn’t do anything.」
「It’s not that I don’t do anything. I at least walk one stop.」
I don’t know what Miyagi means by “that kind of feeling,” but it doesn’t mean that there is no flab.
「Is that so?」
Miyagi said, as if taken, and the conversation was cut short. There was no response to my question, I asked,「Do you want to exercise with me?」She didn’t ask me to cook dinner quickly, she didn’t ask me to cook with her, only silence.
It’s not an uncomfortable silence, but Miyagi is staring at me, so I somehow call her「Miyagi.」
「What?」
I didn’t have anything to say, I just wanted to call her Miyagi, and I didn’t have the words ready to be spoken. So the words that don’t need to be said,「About Mio,」pop out of my mouth.
「I don’t want to hear about it.」
Miyagi says in a voice devoid of affection.
「Why?」
「You’re going to say she wanted to come visit me at this house for the holidays anyway.」
「Nice try, but wrong answer. She wanted you to come out and play with her during the holidays.」
Since I had mentioned her name, even if only somewhat, I told her in passing what Mio had asked me to tell her this afternoon.
「I don’t want it more. She should go to Sendai-san alone.」
I thought she would say that.
Still, I am glad to hear Miyagi say what I expected.
But I want a different response to my next words than I expected.
「I’m not going either, so why don’t you and I go somewhere for the holidays, Miyagi?」
Mio and Utsunomiya are both gone.
Just me and Miyagi.
I want us to go somewhere.
I looked across the table at Miyagi, who was sitting in my chair.
I had nothing against hamburgers, but my resentment is growing.
Miyagi has not returned yet.
That is the reason why I’m turning my negative feelings toward hamburgers, simply put, I am taking it out on them. If I delve further into these feelings, I can trace them back to her friend.
Utsunomiya Maika sells hamburgers.
To be precise, she works part-time at a fast food restaurant, and Miyagi informed me that she was going to stop by that fast food restaurant before returning home.
I go from my room to the common area with my phone in hand and sit in the chair where Miyagi always sits.
Pictures taken at the school festival or at the zoo.
And pictures taken in this house.
My phone is full of Miyagi and I never get tired of looking at it. I am frustrated by the lack of Miyagi, but I can live with it. I really want to see the real Miyagi, not the one in my phone, but I can’t help what isn’t there.
I let out a big breath.
I didn’t expect to see Miyagi as soon as I got back from college, but it was no fun to hear that she was going to make a side trip. Moreover, the destination is Utsunomiya’s part-time job.
There was no call to go out for dinner.
But Miyagi will probably have a hamburger.
To be correct, what she will eat is a hamburger that Utsunomiya sells at her part-time job. A patty sandwiched between a bun is called a hamburger, but a patty made of ground meat is very similar to a hamburger, so I think it can be thrown into the same category as a hamburger.
I find Miyagi’s detour so uninteresting that I want to think about this nonsense endlessly, and I want to take it out on the hamburger.
I know it is a pointless act.
「What should I make for dinner?」
I am not very hungry, but it is time to prepare dinner. But it’s too much trouble to cook.
No matter how elaborate I make something, it will not taste good without Miyagi. If nothing I eat tastes good, I may as well settle for cup noodles. I feel like I’m being Miyagi-fied at times like this, but cup noodles is quick and easy to prepare, and there are no dishes to wash. It’s perfect for when I’m feeling unmotivated.
「I don’t remember if there was stock of those.」
The other day, when I came home from a part-time job, I saw Miyagi eating a cup noodles. I think that was the last one, or maybe not. My memory is kind of fuzzy, so I put my phone down and check the shelves.
「There’s nothing here.」
I exhale and sit down again in my chair at Miyagi.
If only Miyagi had come home, I wouldn’t have been discouraged by a problem as small as whether or not I had a cup of ramen. I would really hate it.
It is okay for me to be late for my part-time job, but not for Miyagi to be late for her friend’s part-time job.
I can’t help but be disillusioned by the fact that I have such selfish feelings, but I have been stuck in my selfish feelings ever since I met Miyagi. And the feelings are definitely growing and getting out of hand.
After what happened to my family, I had stopped being obsessed or strongly interested in people, but only Miyagi is in a different frame of mind.
I had many friends in high school, but all of them were only superficial, and I can only remember treating them with a pasted-on smile.
When I met Mio in college, I sometimes think that she might become to me what “Utsunomiya is to Miyagi,” but that is all. Even though I was willing to get to know her better, I wasn’t able to deepen the depth of my relationship with her. The “friendships” associated with Mio were more bothersome than I wanted them to be.
Only Miyagi is special and only Miyagi is needed.
If I still want to live with Miyagi in this house, I need to keep going to college. If I stop going to college, my parents will stop paying for it. If I want to live with her beyond that, I need to find employment and money to maintain this place on my own, and I also need to continue to interact with people to some extent.
It is a hassle.
But even if it’s too much trouble, I can’t cut out everything but Miyagi.
And eating is also a necessary part of life.
It is really a hassle, but you should eat dinner.
I’ll have Miyagi buy something for me.
She always looks grumpy, but she will at least go shopping if I ask her to.
I take my phone from the table and send a message saying,『I’m too lazy to cook for one, so go buy something to replace dinner on your way home,』and I get an immediate response.
『What about my dinner?』
『I thought you were going to go eat a hamburger.』
When I return a question to a question, I don’t get a response.
I don’t know what was wrong, but something was wrong.
When I was wondering whether I should send a new message after finding out only such a vague thing, I received a rare phone call from Miyagi.
「I didn’t say anything about eating a hamburger.」
I hear a low, gruff voice coming from my phone.
「I thought you went to Utsunomiya’s part-time job?」
「Why do I have to eat hamburgers when I go to Maika’s?」
「Eh, because Utsunomiya sells hamburgers, right?」
「Sendai-san, if you go to a place that sells hamburgers, do you definitely eat hamburgers?」
The conversation is not engaging.
I’m just returning questions to questions and the conversation is parallel and there is no intersection. I know, but I’m back to returning questions to questions.
「You mean eating dinner at home?」
「Yes. Also, I’m here already.」
「Eh?」
The phone hangs up and I hear the front door open. And Miyagi soon appeared.
「I’m home.」
「Welcome back.」
I call out to Miyagi, who has returned earlier than expected, and she comes trotting over to me.
「…Sendai-san, that’s my seat.」
「Ah, sorry.」
I tried to stand up with my phone, but Miyagi steps on my foot and I cannot stand up. It was not bone-crushing, but she is grumpy and presses my feet against the floor with quite a bit of force.
「Miyagi, move your feet.」
「Dinner, what are you going to do?」
Miyagi says as she stomps on my foot.
「I’ll make something. Omelette with rice?」
「…It’s not hamburger?」
「Did you like the hamburger?」
「Omelette rice is fine. And I think I’ve been eating too many hamburgers lately.」
Miyagi looked neither disappointed nor happy and stepped away from me. Then she sat down on the other side of the table, in the chair I always use.
「Sendai-san, you don’t like hamburgers, do you? Why have you been making so many hamburgers lately?」
It’s an important thing for Miyagi.
That important thing is something I have been asked to make, and it is also connected to my memory. But no matter how many reasons I give, when I tell Miyagi that I like her, her mood turns sour.
The reason why I was making hamburgers is probably similar to that, so if I don’t want to make Miyagi’s mood any worse, I shouldn’t tell her. But then I would have to prepare another reason.
「If you suddenly want to eat it, it’s a hassle to go out and buy the ingredients. So, I thought, why not serve hamburgers so that you don’t ask for them all of a sudden?」
I don’t think it’s a good reason, but I can’t think of any other appropriate reason. I think she might say something. But Miyagi didn’t pursue the question further as to why I made hamburgers over and over again, and blurted out,
「You’re getting fat. I mean, I got fat. You serve too many hamburgers.」
「So, do you want to exercise with me?」
「You’re going to exercise, Sendai-san?」
「I’m doing it. I’m getting fat.」
「Sendai-san is getting fat too.」
Miyagi says in surprise.
「I’m going to get fat. What do you think I am?」
「I kind of thought it was always like that, even if you didn’t do anything.」
「It’s not that I don’t do anything. I at least walk one stop.」
I don’t know what Miyagi means by “that kind of feeling,” but it doesn’t mean that there is no flab.
「Is that so?」
Miyagi said, as if taken, and the conversation was cut short. There was no response to my question, I asked,「Do you want to exercise with me?」She didn’t ask me to cook dinner quickly, she didn’t ask me to cook with her, only silence.
It’s not an uncomfortable silence, but Miyagi is staring at me, so I somehow call her「Miyagi.」
「What?」
I didn’t have anything to say, I just wanted to call her Miyagi, and I didn’t have the words ready to be spoken. So the words that don’t need to be said,「About Mio,」pop out of my mouth.
「I don’t want to hear about it.」
Miyagi says in a voice devoid of affection.
「Why?」
「You’re going to say she wanted to come visit me at this house for the holidays anyway.」
「Nice try, but wrong answer. She wanted you to come out and play with her during the holidays.」
Since I had mentioned her name, even if only somewhat, I told her in passing what Mio had asked me to tell her this afternoon.
「I don’t want it more. She should go to Sendai-san alone.」
I thought she would say that.
Still, I am glad to hear Miyagi say what I expected.
But I want a different response to my next words than I expected.
「I’m not going either, so why don’t you and I go somewhere for the holidays, Miyagi?」
Mio and Utsunomiya are both gone.
Just me and Miyagi.
I want us to go somewhere.
I looked across the table at Miyagi, who was sitting in my chair.
