Chapter 327
"I'm sorry. I, just..."
What on earth had he done? He had only sucked and lightly bitten his fingertip, but his mind flashed wickedly, and this was the result. There were indeed times in the past when he had acted impulsively around Kishiar, but back then, there was at least some minimal hesitation. This time, however, there was no warning whatsoever. It was as helpless as a spark catching dry firewood and instantly spreading into a massive fire. Doing something like this, and not even during the heat period, was a first for him as far as he could remember.
As Yuder tried to rise, stammering, unable to speak properly, Kishiar tightened the arm around his waist, stopping him.
"The temptation was mine, and you only reacted to it. There's no need to be so flustered."
Though they had separated, the lips that were still too close showed remnants of white powder, faintly twinkling in the soft light.
"I never knew you'd react so intensely... but I feel like I've received a proper reward, so it's good."
"Good, you say?"
"The fact that you've revealed your desire so honestly means that the possibility of you accepting me is higher, so of course, it's good."
Kishiar answered Yuder's slow retort with a pleasurable smile, casually shifting one leg. Only then did Yuder realize what had changed below him where he was in contact with Kishiar, and he became even more flustered than before.
'...Oh my God.'
Yuder had always thought of himself as quite dull when it came to lust. Even after Kishiar died in his previous life, he never felt discomfort from not having been with anyone, mainly because Kishiar had usually taken the lead in their relationship.
Perhaps it was because he was an Omega without a scent, but it didn't matter. He never needed to think deeply about that part, especially since his first heat period in this life coincided with the manifestation of his second gender, and he had passed out for the entire duration.
But this was different. Kishiar hadn't touched him with the intent of making love, but merely played a light prank. Yet Yuder's front was unmistakably prominent and swollen.
The hot sensation he'd felt inside his stomach earlier must have been this, and the realization was utterly embarrassing.
'I never felt like this when we kissed before.'
Until now, the longing and attraction he'd felt toward Kishiar seemed to reach beyond the physical and touch something inside him, a thrilling satisfaction that made him lose track of time and become entranced.
This sensation, however, was both similar to and different from the stinging in his body and the heat in his lower half that seemed to weigh down his head.
"Could it be that something's wrong with me because of my injury?"
"What?"
Kishiar's eyes widened, as though he'd heard something ridiculous, and then he burst into laughter.
"That can't be. Kissing is natural, and do you think this is strange?"
"It's not normal to react like this just from a light bite on the finger."
"It is normal. Your body just reacted a little sensitively, that's all."
"But you're perfectly fine, aren't you?"
Kishiar seemed unable to contain his enjoyment of the situation. But Yuder's mood had darkened even further. The fact that his partner remained undisturbed, while he was still engorged, made him feel even more ashamed when compared to his previous life.
Certainly, it hadn't been like this in his previous life. It was always Kishiar who would unexpectedly knock people over, running like a person who had lost his sanity. He still had memories of being flabbergasted by Kishiar's sudden strange touches in the middle of a perfectly normal conversation, but now the situation was reversed.
"Damn it, if that's the problem, there is something I haven't confessed so far. I think I need to tell you now."
"What is it?"
"Promise me you won't look at me like a beast after you know."
"I will think about it after I hear it."
Then Kishiar's eyes seemed to narrow, but he quickly suppressed a smile.
"I usually exert a considerable amount of strength to stabilize my bowl, and if I apply that, I can do something quite useful. Do you understand what I mean?"
"..."
"It means I can control the situation down there to some extent."
This was truly... unexpected. Kishiar, who had noticed Yuder's subtly changed expression, whispered that it was true.
"Especially lately, I've been putting a lot of effort into that."
"So, you mean you're still doing that now?"
"Of course."
Kishiar, who had answered, slightly lifted his head and gently brushed Yuder's eye with his lips. At the same time as he felt a little more strength in the big hand that had been wrapping around his back and waist, Yuder felt something expanding at a tremendous speed beneath their intertwined bodies.
"Do you believe me now?"
He had no choice but to believe it, even though he didn't want to. Something much harder than Yuder's slightly swollen front was poking between his legs. It was a sensation he must have felt many times in his previous life, but due to his faint memory of that time, it felt astonishingly large. Startled by the heat rising from the contact, Yuder lifted his body.
‘What is this...?’
In his surprise, complex thoughts vanished in an instant. Unlike Yuder's, which was only half-swollen, Kishiar's was boldly asserting its intent, as if it had never been dormant. Unable to continue his words before the vividly revealed physical desire, Kishiar faintly lifted the corner of his lips as if he had expected this. Whether it was true that he had let go of the restraint, sweat had formed faintly between his brows.
"You thought I was beast-like, didn't you?"
"No, it's not that..."
Yuder closed his mouth, unable to articulate exactly what he was feeling, and the slight swelling he had felt completely subsided due to his surprise.
"Why in the world... were you holding this back?"
"Because I thought you wouldn't want it."
"I don't remember ever saying that."
"People convey more meaning through their eyes and bodies than words. Even though it may seem complicated, it's surprisingly simple. Desire doesn't always overlap with longing, just like how you've been suppressing yourself by hiding the back part..."
Even though his lower region seemed about to burst at any moment, Kishiar spoke quite calmly. However, his flushed cheeks could not be hidden.
"So, I wanted to walk at the same pace as you."
"So, you mean you would have held this back for a lifetime if needed?"
"While I'm not as extreme as the priests who claim that physical desire is merely a trial and a greed to be discarded, I don't attach much significance to it. Naturally... conversing with you, even if it's just a single word, is more enjoyable than this."
At the same time as his words ended, a hot breath tingled at his ear. He seemed to have said something like this a few times before, but it was the first time it had struck his heart so profoundly. He felt both awestruck and desolate, and then, once again, memories from a past life welled up, making his throat feel scorched and dry.
‘...So am I.’
Yuder couldn't let go of the hand holding the man in front of him. Even if he didn't have the right to do so as a prisoner condemned to death, he did so anyway. If he had to endure a pain that would forever pierce his heart, rather than longing for Kishiar by his side, he thought it wouldn't matter.
For the first time in his life, an intense longing mixed with desire surged up from beneath his mind, boiling with desperation. It made him feel as though he would drown in its intensity, and Yuder closed his eyes for a moment.
"Commander... You really are too much."
Kishiar chuckled softly at the single sentence that flowed out with great difficulty, laden with many emotions.
"I think so too."
Each time he laughed, his overlapping body also received stimulation simultaneously.
"Every day, I'm scheming, wanting to monopolize such an attractive partner all to myself, even if it burns my mind to ashes. I truly am a wicked person."
"That's not what I meant."
"I know."
Thus, saying such things in itself meant that he was too much.
His dark, sunken eyes were hot. His slightly parted lips were hot. The flames that began to burn inside him were hot.
And the arms that completely bared everything and embraced Yuder were too hot to bear. Unable to withstand the heat, Yuder opened his eyes again and saw his own face reflected in his reddened eyes.
A man, as flushed as Kishiar, revealed his intense desire for his opponent, gritting his teeth and panting. Kishiar's words that had distinguished between longing and desire were only then clearly understood.
Yuder barely suppressed the desire to kiss him and lifted his body a little. The arms around his waist were bothersome.
"First... please let me go."
"Why?"
"Don't you have to calm down?"
"You can calm down right now, so can't you get up a little later? It's a rare opportunity, so I wanted to enjoy it a little more."
"...Please stop doing things that seem bad for your body."
No matter how he thought about it, enduring it didn't seem healthy. Yuder cautiously twisted his body a little, placing his hand between his legs where it kept poking through the space revealed.
For a moment, the fingers that had been fondly tracing behind Yuder's ears flinched and stopped. Yuder slowly felt a very secret satisfaction, looking into the red eyes that began to lose composure. Only now did the shame he felt when he thought he was the only one inflamed fade away.
‘You may not know me, but I know you.’
Yuder knew exactly what kind of look that beautiful and composed man had when he was burning with desire.
"There are ways to calm down other than that, aren't there?"
Chapter 327
"I'm sorry. I, just..."
What on earth had he done? He had only sucked and lightly bitten his fingertip, but his mind flashed wickedly, and this was the result. There were indeed times in the past when he had acted impulsively around Kishiar, but back then, there was at least some minimal hesitation. This time, however, there was no warning whatsoever. It was as helpless as a spark catching dry firewood and instantly spreading into a massive fire. Doing something like this, and not even during the heat period, was a first for him as far as he could remember.
As Yuder tried to rise, stammering, unable to speak properly, Kishiar tightened the arm around his waist, stopping him.
"The temptation was mine, and you only reacted to it. There's no need to be so flustered."
Though they had separated, the lips that were still too close showed remnants of white powder, faintly twinkling in the soft light.
"I never knew you'd react so intensely... but I feel like I've received a proper reward, so it's good."
"Good, you say?"
"The fact that you've revealed your desire so honestly means that the possibility of you accepting me is higher, so of course, it's good."
Kishiar answered Yuder's slow retort with a pleasurable smile, casually shifting one leg. Only then did Yuder realize what had changed below him where he was in contact with Kishiar, and he became even more flustered than before.
'...Oh my God.'
Yuder had always thought of himself as quite dull when it came to lust. Even after Kishiar died in his previous life, he never felt discomfort from not having been with anyone, mainly because Kishiar had usually taken the lead in their relationship.
Perhaps it was because he was an Omega without a scent, but it didn't matter. He never needed to think deeply about that part, especially since his first heat period in this life coincided with the manifestation of his second gender, and he had passed out for the entire duration.
But this was different. Kishiar hadn't touched him with the intent of making love, but merely played a light prank. Yet Yuder's front was unmistakably prominent and swollen.
The hot sensation he'd felt inside his stomach earlier must have been this, and the realization was utterly embarrassing.
'I never felt like this when we kissed before.'
Until now, the longing and attraction he'd felt toward Kishiar seemed to reach beyond the physical and touch something inside him, a thrilling satisfaction that made him lose track of time and become entranced.
This sensation, however, was both similar to and different from the stinging in his body and the heat in his lower half that seemed to weigh down his head.
"Could it be that something's wrong with me because of my injury?"
"What?"
Kishiar's eyes widened, as though he'd heard something ridiculous, and then he burst into laughter.
"That can't be. Kissing is natural, and do you think this is strange?"
"It's not normal to react like this just from a light bite on the finger."
"It is normal. Your body just reacted a little sensitively, that's all."
"But you're perfectly fine, aren't you?"
Kishiar seemed unable to contain his enjoyment of the situation. But Yuder's mood had darkened even further. The fact that his partner remained undisturbed, while he was still engorged, made him feel even more ashamed when compared to his previous life.
Certainly, it hadn't been like this in his previous life. It was always Kishiar who would unexpectedly knock people over, running like a person who had lost his sanity. He still had memories of being flabbergasted by Kishiar's sudden strange touches in the middle of a perfectly normal conversation, but now the situation was reversed.
"Damn it, if that's the problem, there is something I haven't confessed so far. I think I need to tell you now."
"What is it?"
"Promise me you won't look at me like a beast after you know."
"I will think about it after I hear it."
Then Kishiar's eyes seemed to narrow, but he quickly suppressed a smile.
"I usually exert a considerable amount of strength to stabilize my bowl, and if I apply that, I can do something quite useful. Do you understand what I mean?"
"..."
"It means I can control the situation down there to some extent."
This was truly... unexpected. Kishiar, who had noticed Yuder's subtly changed expression, whispered that it was true.
"Especially lately, I've been putting a lot of effort into that."
"So, you mean you're still doing that now?"
"Of course."
Kishiar, who had answered, slightly lifted his head and gently brushed Yuder's eye with his lips. At the same time as he felt a little more strength in the big hand that had been wrapping around his back and waist, Yuder felt something expanding at a tremendous speed beneath their intertwined bodies.
"Do you believe me now?"
He had no choice but to believe it, even though he didn't want to. Something much harder than Yuder's slightly swollen front was poking between his legs. It was a sensation he must have felt many times in his previous life, but due to his faint memory of that time, it felt astonishingly large. Startled by the heat rising from the contact, Yuder lifted his body.
‘What is this...?’
In his surprise, complex thoughts vanished in an instant. Unlike Yuder's, which was only half-swollen, Kishiar's was boldly asserting its intent, as if it had never been dormant. Unable to continue his words before the vividly revealed physical desire, Kishiar faintly lifted the corner of his lips as if he had expected this. Whether it was true that he had let go of the restraint, sweat had formed faintly between his brows.
"You thought I was beast-like, didn't you?"
"No, it's not that..."
Yuder closed his mouth, unable to articulate exactly what he was feeling, and the slight swelling he had felt completely subsided due to his surprise.
"Why in the world... were you holding this back?"
"Because I thought you wouldn't want it."
"I don't remember ever saying that."
"People convey more meaning through their eyes and bodies than words. Even though it may seem complicated, it's surprisingly simple. Desire doesn't always overlap with longing, just like how you've been suppressing yourself by hiding the back part..."
Even though his lower region seemed about to burst at any moment, Kishiar spoke quite calmly. However, his flushed cheeks could not be hidden.
"So, I wanted to walk at the same pace as you."
"So, you mean you would have held this back for a lifetime if needed?"
"While I'm not as extreme as the priests who claim that physical desire is merely a trial and a greed to be discarded, I don't attach much significance to it. Naturally... conversing with you, even if it's just a single word, is more enjoyable than this."
At the same time as his words ended, a hot breath tingled at his ear. He seemed to have said something like this a few times before, but it was the first time it had struck his heart so profoundly. He felt both awestruck and desolate, and then, once again, memories from a past life welled up, making his throat feel scorched and dry.
‘...So am I.’
Yuder couldn't let go of the hand holding the man in front of him. Even if he didn't have the right to do so as a prisoner condemned to death, he did so anyway. If he had to endure a pain that would forever pierce his heart, rather than longing for Kishiar by his side, he thought it wouldn't matter.
For the first time in his life, an intense longing mixed with desire surged up from beneath his mind, boiling with desperation. It made him feel as though he would drown in its intensity, and Yuder closed his eyes for a moment.
"Commander... You really are too much."
Kishiar chuckled softly at the single sentence that flowed out with great difficulty, laden with many emotions.
"I think so too."
Each time he laughed, his overlapping body also received stimulation simultaneously.
"Every day, I'm scheming, wanting to monopolize such an attractive partner all to myself, even if it burns my mind to ashes. I truly am a wicked person."
"That's not what I meant."
"I know."
Thus, saying such things in itself meant that he was too much.
His dark, sunken eyes were hot. His slightly parted lips were hot. The flames that began to burn inside him were hot.
And the arms that completely bared everything and embraced Yuder were too hot to bear. Unable to withstand the heat, Yuder opened his eyes again and saw his own face reflected in his reddened eyes.
A man, as flushed as Kishiar, revealed his intense desire for his opponent, gritting his teeth and panting. Kishiar's words that had distinguished between longing and desire were only then clearly understood.
Yuder barely suppressed the desire to kiss him and lifted his body a little. The arms around his waist were bothersome.
"First... please let me go."
"Why?"
"Don't you have to calm down?"
"You can calm down right now, so can't you get up a little later? It's a rare opportunity, so I wanted to enjoy it a little more."
"...Please stop doing things that seem bad for your body."
No matter how he thought about it, enduring it didn't seem healthy. Yuder cautiously twisted his body a little, placing his hand between his legs where it kept poking through the space revealed.
For a moment, the fingers that had been fondly tracing behind Yuder's ears flinched and stopped. Yuder slowly felt a very secret satisfaction, looking into the red eyes that began to lose composure. Only now did the shame he felt when he thought he was the only one inflamed fade away.
‘You may not know me, but I know you.’
Yuder knew exactly what kind of look that beautiful and composed man had when he was burning with desire.
"There are ways to calm down other than that, aren't there?"
