Let’s not worry about it.
In her current helpless state, it was obvious that she couldn’t have a normal conversation with Carl if she met him. Even if he tells a joke, she wouldn’t laugh at all. She might have been unnecessarily irritated by the grateful person visiting her. Fanora was afraid of that.
“…”
She acts like the world is over, but on the other hand, she worries about others. I lived my life twice, so why am I still so pathetic? As she became complacent, she kept reverting back to her weak personality she never wanted to return to.
Fanora rested her hand on her temple and looked out the window with an irritated expression before moving back to the bed. She sat down on the bed and stared blankly into the white snow over the window.
“…”
And this time, only ten minutes later. She obviously thought not to care. However, Fanora couldn’t bear her intrusive feeling, so she eventually returned from her seat. The window was where she headed to.
“I knew it would be like this.”
She glanced at the window and saw Carl Andras still standing there, as she expected. He didn’t even shake off the snow accumulated on his shoulders and just stood at the gate.
Fanora frowned at the sight. But it was that moment. Carl must have been bored waiting quietly, so he raised his head and looked around the mansion, and in the process, he found the window of Fanora’s room.
“!”
“…!”
She didn’t know she would get caught like this. Fanora just made eye contact with the man who was far away. As soon as Carl found her, he opened his mouth and smiled broadly. When she saw his smiling face just from making eye contact, it made her feel complicated.
“Carl!”
Fanora stared into his red eyes, opened the window, and leaned out. She shouted as loud as she could.
“Even if you stand there like that, I have no intention of seeing you. Go away!”
She was determined. No matter what Carl pleads with, she has to refuse it coldly. Just like this, she would cut off ties with the world and die without leaving any regrets behind. She raised her eyebrows and shouted with that thought in her mind.
“Lady Fanora!”
However, this was the sound of Carl answering after hearing Fanora’s shout.
“I forgot the address you gave me last time!”
“What?!”
What’s going on now? He made a bombshell statement about forgetting the location of the holy relic she had told him about. Fanora completely forgot all the resolutions she had made in the meantime. Her complexion, which was already pale due to her illness, became even paler. She immediately turned around and shook the bell wildly.
“Cecil! Go down and get that person in right now!”
If it was an intentional remark, it would be shocking. She couldn’t help but let him into the mansion. It was because she couldn’t shout out the location of the holy relic from the window.
Fanora had no choice but to have her maid bring Carl into the parlor. It was their first conversation since Aloken’s funeral.
* * *
Eventually, the two sat alone in the parlor, without a servant, in front of the prepared tea table. Fanora handed out cookies and tea as a courtesy to welcome her guests. Then Carl said ‘Thank you,’ and ate the cookie.
“…”
With Carl comfortably eating cookies, Fanora’s face was speechless. She asked, her lips quivering with a pale face. “Now, did you forget it…?”
It was basically information about Europe. It’s a holy relic that gives eternal life that cannot be obtained even if you pay hundreds of millions of dollars. How could he forget its location?
“I didn’t mean to forget it at first.”
“Pardon?”
“W-were you sure about the cabin on the hill and that I could find the old woman? However, I was confused as to whether the direction was east or west…”
Fanora looked colder than ever. When Carl saw this, he quietly looked down with a dejected look on his face.
“Sigh…”
Still, fortunately, she was lucky to wake up after drinking poison. Now that she’s awake, it’s not a problem to tell him the location of Europa again. Fanora spoke to him in a sighing voice. “Because I deceived you and gave you information in an unexpected situation. Yes, it might be confusing.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’ll draw a map and give it to you so you won’t forget it again.”
Carl listened quietly to what she said. However, the topic of the conversation that followed wasn’t about holy relics.
“By the way, are you feeling better? Lady Fanora.”
He finally revealed his purpose for visiting the mansion.
“I was very surprised to find out that Lady Fanora drank poison…”
“Did you know?”
“Yes, I heard it from someone else when you were unconscious.”
He looked carefully at Fanora’s pale face and noticed her crying expression.
“How did you end up drinking poison?”
Although Aloken’s betrayal had intensified her suspicion of people, she couldn’t bear it when Carl looked at her like that. That’s how much Carl genuinely cared about her.
“It just happened.”
“Don’t talk like that. Lady Fanora almost died of it. Even now, it’s clearly visible your health is damaged, so how can you speak so carelessly about your own life?”
Carl usually doesn’t have much disagreement with Fanora’s words. Perhaps that’s why Fanora felt his hard reaction was unfamiliar.
“I don’t know how you thought of drinking deadly poison. There must have been some reason.”
“…”
“Are you going to do that again?”
Fanora rolled her eyes at his question. He had hit the nail on the head, so she didn’t know how to respond to it. If she said no here, he would quickly realize she was lying.
“As you said, I’m tired right now, and sitting for a long time is hard for me. First, let’s end the story about Europa—”
“Are you changing the topic now?”
Fanora tried the old-fashioned method of changing the topic of conversation. But with one sentence from Carl, her plan was shattered.
“No! Lady Fanora.”
Carl jumped up from his seat and pounded the table with both hands.
“Don’t think like that, please.”
He went on to talk one after another with a look of bewilderment.
“Why should Lady Fanora die? Y-you’re still young, so you shouldn’t think like that. If Lady Fanora dies, you will go to hell. Wouldn’t it be better here than there?”
“You said hell so naturally now…”
“Besides, Aloken is dead too. Lady Fanora is free now, so why do you want to die?”
“…”
“Is it because your revenge is over? Then let’s find something else to do together. As long as you stay alive, everything will get better.”
Fanora couldn’t refute Carl’s words. As she listened quietly, she realized that his every word was correct, and there was nothing wrong with it.
“…Shall I?” In an uncertain voice, she asked if it would be okay to stay alive.
Carl responded right away. “Of course. Lady Fanora, why did you take revenge on your enemies by killing them…? Isn’t that because you thought your enemies would be unhappy if you did that and that it would be revenge?”
“That’s right.”
“See. Lady Fanora already knows that life is the most precious thing.”
Carl didn’t just respond positively to Fanora’s actions. He knew very well that the means weren’t right. Nevertheless, Carl used Fanora’s revenge as an example to express the importance of life. It was truly contradictory.
“I don’t know the details of Lady Fanora’s situation. Unless I live Lady Fanora’s life, I won’t even know for the rest of my life. So, no matter how hard it is, I won’t tell you to hold it and stay alive.
“…”
“But…”
Carl recommended with an expression that looked like he was about to collapse at any moment.
“Let’s live one more day.”
“…”
“Live until tomorrow. And if tomorrow is fun… Just close your eyes and live until the day after tomorrow. Okay?”
Has he ever asked so desperately? Fanora faced him with a dazed feeling. As he persuaded her repeatedly, her heart began to change. When she thought about it later, she thought the reason she wanted to let go of everything was an impulsive emotion caused by the sense of betrayal she felt from Aloken.
“I will try my best. To find something that will make Lady Fanora want to live.”
Fanora thought about the man in front of her, fidgeting with fear that she might drink poison again.
Carl is catching on.
That’s why she didn’t want to see him. It felt like she was watching a dog blindly following its owner. After seeing those eyes, she couldn’t close her eyes comfortably anymore.
“Alright. I understand everything, so calm down, Carl.”
“Really?”
“Yes, you are absolutely right.”
Fanora eventually pushed the plan of drinking poison to the back of her head. She then continued. “Besides, if I think about it, I still have work left to do. At my godmother’s banquet, I hastily said that you killed Aloken…”
“…”
“Seeing what you’re doing, it can’t be. I will surely obtain Europa myself and deliver it to you, so please wait until my birthday this summer.”
The incident that Carl had forgotten the location of the holy relic shocked her a lot. So Fanora declared with a shocked face. Rather than entrusting the holy relic to him, she would just take care of everything herself.
“So you’ll never commit suicide, at least until your birthday?”
“Yes. Well…”
Carl was delighted to hear her. It was to the point he was on the verge of tears.
I guess that’s not acting. But then again, that Aloken couldn’t even produce tears. Fanora watched his behavior with mixed feelings.
“When I lost my target, Aloken, I wondered how I would live in vain.”
“…”
“I’ll try to hold on. I have to keep my promise, so I should consider this deal more important than my life.”
“Ah… That’s why you made that face at the funeral…”
Carl held the teacup, sweating profusely. No matter how she looked at him, it didn’t look like he was enjoying the tea.
Is it unpleasant to even mention him because he was the one who threatened me? Fanora tilted her head to the right but quickly straightened her posture. She was already sleepy, perhaps as an aftereffect of the poison.
“Lady Fanora.” Meanwhile, Carl took a sip of cooled tea and continued speaking. “Anyway, this is the scented candle I was going to give you today. Leaving it by your bedside will help remove any remaining toxins from your body.”
“Is this why you were standing in the snow? You can pass it to the servant.”
“That’s because I really wanted to check on Lady Fanora’s condition…”
Fanora fiddled with the scented candles he took out of his arms. It was a scented candle with a faintly sweet smell.
“Thank you.” Fanora thanked him in a dry tone. It was true that, thanks to him, she was able to shake off her bad thoughts, but there were still shadows in her mind.
“You look tired. Should I go now?”
“I saw earlier that Andras’s family carriage was sent back, so I’ll lend you my family carriage instead.”
The conversation between the two ended here. Carl, who was looking at Fanora’s complexion, soon left the mansion after hesitating.
I’m glad she woke up safely. From Carl’s perspective, just confirming that Fanora had woken up was a great harvest.
“But…”
He had a personal problem. As Carl trudged to the carriage Fanora had prepared for him, he suddenly stood tall and thought. Fanora was devastated by Aloken’s death. Oh gosh.
He didn’t want this result.
But there was no choice back then. He couldn’t know what would happen to her if he didn’t use Ganimede. He didn’t want her to be locked up and killed.
Things done with good intentions don’t always produce good results. Carl sighed as he realized that fact again.
I just wanted her to be happy.
What should he do? Things have already happened.
Carl eventually decided to focus on the future. This was a much healthier mindset than being stuck in the past.
Let’s not worry about it.
In her current helpless state, it was obvious that she couldn’t have a normal conversation with Carl if she met him. Even if he tells a joke, she wouldn’t laugh at all. She might have been unnecessarily irritated by the grateful person visiting her. Fanora was afraid of that.
“…”
She acts like the world is over, but on the other hand, she worries about others. I lived my life twice, so why am I still so pathetic? As she became complacent, she kept reverting back to her weak personality she never wanted to return to.
Fanora rested her hand on her temple and looked out the window with an irritated expression before moving back to the bed. She sat down on the bed and stared blankly into the white snow over the window.
“…”
And this time, only ten minutes later. She obviously thought not to care. However, Fanora couldn’t bear her intrusive feeling, so she eventually returned from her seat. The window was where she headed to.
“I knew it would be like this.”
She glanced at the window and saw Carl Andras still standing there, as she expected. He didn’t even shake off the snow accumulated on his shoulders and just stood at the gate.
Fanora frowned at the sight. But it was that moment. Carl must have been bored waiting quietly, so he raised his head and looked around the mansion, and in the process, he found the window of Fanora’s room.
“!”
“…!”
She didn’t know she would get caught like this. Fanora just made eye contact with the man who was far away. As soon as Carl found her, he opened his mouth and smiled broadly. When she saw his smiling face just from making eye contact, it made her feel complicated.
“Carl!”
Fanora stared into his red eyes, opened the window, and leaned out. She shouted as loud as she could.
“Even if you stand there like that, I have no intention of seeing you. Go away!”
She was determined. No matter what Carl pleads with, she has to refuse it coldly. Just like this, she would cut off ties with the world and die without leaving any regrets behind. She raised her eyebrows and shouted with that thought in her mind.
“Lady Fanora!”
However, this was the sound of Carl answering after hearing Fanora’s shout.
“I forgot the address you gave me last time!”
“What?!”
What’s going on now? He made a bombshell statement about forgetting the location of the holy relic she had told him about. Fanora completely forgot all the resolutions she had made in the meantime. Her complexion, which was already pale due to her illness, became even paler. She immediately turned around and shook the bell wildly.
“Cecil! Go down and get that person in right now!”
If it was an intentional remark, it would be shocking. She couldn’t help but let him into the mansion. It was because she couldn’t shout out the location of the holy relic from the window.
Fanora had no choice but to have her maid bring Carl into the parlor. It was their first conversation since Aloken’s funeral.
* * *
Eventually, the two sat alone in the parlor, without a servant, in front of the prepared tea table. Fanora handed out cookies and tea as a courtesy to welcome her guests. Then Carl said ‘Thank you,’ and ate the cookie.
“…”
With Carl comfortably eating cookies, Fanora’s face was speechless. She asked, her lips quivering with a pale face. “Now, did you forget it…?”
It was basically information about Europe. It’s a holy relic that gives eternal life that cannot be obtained even if you pay hundreds of millions of dollars. How could he forget its location?
“I didn’t mean to forget it at first.”
“Pardon?”
“W-were you sure about the cabin on the hill and that I could find the old woman? However, I was confused as to whether the direction was east or west…”
Fanora looked colder than ever. When Carl saw this, he quietly looked down with a dejected look on his face.
“Sigh…”
Still, fortunately, she was lucky to wake up after drinking poison. Now that she’s awake, it’s not a problem to tell him the location of Europa again. Fanora spoke to him in a sighing voice. “Because I deceived you and gave you information in an unexpected situation. Yes, it might be confusing.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’ll draw a map and give it to you so you won’t forget it again.”
Carl listened quietly to what she said. However, the topic of the conversation that followed wasn’t about holy relics.
“By the way, are you feeling better? Lady Fanora.”
He finally revealed his purpose for visiting the mansion.
“I was very surprised to find out that Lady Fanora drank poison…”
“Did you know?”
“Yes, I heard it from someone else when you were unconscious.”
He looked carefully at Fanora’s pale face and noticed her crying expression.
“How did you end up drinking poison?”
Although Aloken’s betrayal had intensified her suspicion of people, she couldn’t bear it when Carl looked at her like that. That’s how much Carl genuinely cared about her.
“It just happened.”
“Don’t talk like that. Lady Fanora almost died of it. Even now, it’s clearly visible your health is damaged, so how can you speak so carelessly about your own life?”
Carl usually doesn’t have much disagreement with Fanora’s words. Perhaps that’s why Fanora felt his hard reaction was unfamiliar.
“I don’t know how you thought of drinking deadly poison. There must have been some reason.”
“…”
“Are you going to do that again?”
Fanora rolled her eyes at his question. He had hit the nail on the head, so she didn’t know how to respond to it. If she said no here, he would quickly realize she was lying.
“As you said, I’m tired right now, and sitting for a long time is hard for me. First, let’s end the story about Europa—”
“Are you changing the topic now?”
Fanora tried the old-fashioned method of changing the topic of conversation. But with one sentence from Carl, her plan was shattered.
“No! Lady Fanora.”
Carl jumped up from his seat and pounded the table with both hands.
“Don’t think like that, please.”
He went on to talk one after another with a look of bewilderment.
“Why should Lady Fanora die? Y-you’re still young, so you shouldn’t think like that. If Lady Fanora dies, you will go to hell. Wouldn’t it be better here than there?”
“You said hell so naturally now…”
“Besides, Aloken is dead too. Lady Fanora is free now, so why do you want to die?”
“…”
“Is it because your revenge is over? Then let’s find something else to do together. As long as you stay alive, everything will get better.”
Fanora couldn’t refute Carl’s words. As she listened quietly, she realized that his every word was correct, and there was nothing wrong with it.
“…Shall I?” In an uncertain voice, she asked if it would be okay to stay alive.
Carl responded right away. “Of course. Lady Fanora, why did you take revenge on your enemies by killing them…? Isn’t that because you thought your enemies would be unhappy if you did that and that it would be revenge?”
“That’s right.”
“See. Lady Fanora already knows that life is the most precious thing.”
Carl didn’t just respond positively to Fanora’s actions. He knew very well that the means weren’t right. Nevertheless, Carl used Fanora’s revenge as an example to express the importance of life. It was truly contradictory.
“I don’t know the details of Lady Fanora’s situation. Unless I live Lady Fanora’s life, I won’t even know for the rest of my life. So, no matter how hard it is, I won’t tell you to hold it and stay alive.
“…”
“But…”
Carl recommended with an expression that looked like he was about to collapse at any moment.
“Let’s live one more day.”
“…”
“Live until tomorrow. And if tomorrow is fun… Just close your eyes and live until the day after tomorrow. Okay?”
Has he ever asked so desperately? Fanora faced him with a dazed feeling. As he persuaded her repeatedly, her heart began to change. When she thought about it later, she thought the reason she wanted to let go of everything was an impulsive emotion caused by the sense of betrayal she felt from Aloken.
“I will try my best. To find something that will make Lady Fanora want to live.”
Fanora thought about the man in front of her, fidgeting with fear that she might drink poison again.
Carl is catching on.
That’s why she didn’t want to see him. It felt like she was watching a dog blindly following its owner. After seeing those eyes, she couldn’t close her eyes comfortably anymore.
“Alright. I understand everything, so calm down, Carl.”
“Really?”
“Yes, you are absolutely right.”
Fanora eventually pushed the plan of drinking poison to the back of her head. She then continued. “Besides, if I think about it, I still have work left to do. At my godmother’s banquet, I hastily said that you killed Aloken…”
“…”
“Seeing what you’re doing, it can’t be. I will surely obtain Europa myself and deliver it to you, so please wait until my birthday this summer.”
The incident that Carl had forgotten the location of the holy relic shocked her a lot. So Fanora declared with a shocked face. Rather than entrusting the holy relic to him, she would just take care of everything herself.
“So you’ll never commit suicide, at least until your birthday?”
“Yes. Well…”
Carl was delighted to hear her. It was to the point he was on the verge of tears.
I guess that’s not acting. But then again, that Aloken couldn’t even produce tears. Fanora watched his behavior with mixed feelings.
“When I lost my target, Aloken, I wondered how I would live in vain.”
“…”
“I’ll try to hold on. I have to keep my promise, so I should consider this deal more important than my life.”
“Ah… That’s why you made that face at the funeral…”
Carl held the teacup, sweating profusely. No matter how she looked at him, it didn’t look like he was enjoying the tea.
Is it unpleasant to even mention him because he was the one who threatened me? Fanora tilted her head to the right but quickly straightened her posture. She was already sleepy, perhaps as an aftereffect of the poison.
“Lady Fanora.” Meanwhile, Carl took a sip of cooled tea and continued speaking. “Anyway, this is the scented candle I was going to give you today. Leaving it by your bedside will help remove any remaining toxins from your body.”
“Is this why you were standing in the snow? You can pass it to the servant.”
“That’s because I really wanted to check on Lady Fanora’s condition…”
Fanora fiddled with the scented candles he took out of his arms. It was a scented candle with a faintly sweet smell.
“Thank you.” Fanora thanked him in a dry tone. It was true that, thanks to him, she was able to shake off her bad thoughts, but there were still shadows in her mind.
“You look tired. Should I go now?”
“I saw earlier that Andras’s family carriage was sent back, so I’ll lend you my family carriage instead.”
The conversation between the two ended here. Carl, who was looking at Fanora’s complexion, soon left the mansion after hesitating.
I’m glad she woke up safely. From Carl’s perspective, just confirming that Fanora had woken up was a great harvest.
“But…”
He had a personal problem. As Carl trudged to the carriage Fanora had prepared for him, he suddenly stood tall and thought. Fanora was devastated by Aloken’s death. Oh gosh.
He didn’t want this result.
But there was no choice back then. He couldn’t know what would happen to her if he didn’t use Ganimede. He didn’t want her to be locked up and killed.
Things done with good intentions don’t always produce good results. Carl sighed as he realized that fact again.
I just wanted her to be happy.
What should he do? Things have already happened.
Carl eventually decided to focus on the future. This was a much healthier mindset than being stuck in the past.
